The Baby Arrangement

Chapter 110: !

Neither of them slept- not woth the thought of RJ in so much pain with little to be done. Most of the night Beth just stared at the ceiling hoping this was all just one big nightmare that would change back to normal in the morning. But reality is, is that this is real and the consequences just down right suck.

Her whole body this morning is in slow motion; her mind, flashing with speed. Staring at the clock in the kitchen, Beth finds it the least comforting thing in her life. Time- as we know stands still for no one. It passes us by like a bullet train- too fast to even make out individual cars. Time as Beth refers to it now- is a bitch.

"Mommy? Aunt Maggie's here." Kensi calls as she escourts her aunt into the kitchen.

"Thanks Kens..." Beth saddly says as she kisses her little girl's head." Daryl was in the garage all night- doing God knows what- and is still out there this morning.

"I heard...are you okay?"

"Do I have to be?" Beth asks robotically. "My son is in pain and I can't do anything about it and my other son is mentally ill some how. How am I supposed to be remotely okay? You realize that this whole thing is one big sign that I shouldn't have been a mother? I love my kids nore than anything, but God so cruelly keeps trying to take them from me."

"He isn't trying to take anyone Beth. And you shouldn't say such things anyway. Things happen. If Isaac is really mentally ill- the best thing for him is to get checked out and to deal with the problem head on."

"Maggie- thank you- but you couldn't posaibly know what this feels like, cause if you did- you'd know that the advice you're giving is complete shit."

"Have you lost your mind or something? Beth what is wrong with you? You're acting like yer just ready to give up everything?" Maggie sits beside Beth at the table and notices that she is so disheveled that it's hard to recognize her sister. "Beth, what is up with you?"

"Daryl... Is leaving." Maggie's eyes widen in shcok and her eyebrows raise high on her face.

"No...no...he loves you. He wouldn't leave you."

"We talked about it a lot last night before ge went to the garage...he's taking Isaac to live somewhere else while doctors figure out what's wrong with him. He wants me to keep Kensi and RJ so they are safe..."

"Beth, that's not leaving you. That's momentarily seperating the problem to find a solution. It's not like he'll be gone forever- yer not getting a divorce." Beth's face sinks lower and lower as tears pour from her eyes. Maggie just doesn't understand it. "You're... You're not getting a divorce, right?"

"The last two years we've been losing each other...with the kids and him working all the time. We haven't had sex in three years Maggie... He doesn't look at me the same- he doesn't hold me like he used to. At night he's so far away from me that some nights I feel so damn alone even when he's only two feet away. He says he loves me, but it's not how it used to sound. He doesn't touch me, except when he feels he must and when he kisses me...it's like...it's like he's waiting for it to be over. I've done everything I can to try and make him love me again... He just...he just doesn't."

Her tears pour from her face like a waterfall after a heavy rain. All Maggie can do is stare at the space between her and her sister- a gap she'll always be able to see, but never be able to cross.

In the garage, Daryl works under his motorcycle. He's been taking the same nut and washer off for the last four hours.

Take it off.

Put it on.

Take it off.

Put it on.

Take it-

A repeated motion to dull his inner pain and loathing. It's not hard for him to understand the falling out between him and Beth- the recent incident nust topped the sundae off like a cherry. He doesn't know when he stopped feeling passion for Beth that was once a covetted jewel, just that it had been missing for almost two years now. It started dying after they bought the new house. He had to work more hours to be able to pay the stack of bills. Between buying diapers, food, toys, and expensive gifts to make Beth happy- Daryl started selling his happiness. It was too much. It's still too much. He can't compete when he has three kids- two of which want to kill each other- a hug dog, lavish house, gorgeous wife- and no actual worth.

Taking Isaac away is just the first step in it all- the hardest step. He truly hates hurting Beth this way, but he rather do it now than later down the road when it won't be just one kid having to understand the seperation, but three. They've only been married for about four years now- and in those four years, more tragedy and pain has hit them and with more hits came less and less recovering.

So staring at the bottom of his bike, Daryl just feels the pain imprinting a deeper mark than anything else ever could.

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Dear Readers- please read-

At this point yinz are probably ready to hunt me down and shoot me- please refrain for through the clouds of smoke will come a rainbow. You'll have to be patient and wait for it, but I promise you now, that Beth and Daryl will live happily ever after!

You should all know me by now to know that I will never cheat or rob you of our most precious dream- Bethyl/Normily. So while you may experience anger, fristration, depression (etc) from the next so many chapters- PLEASE REMEMBER! I will restore all that is broken, mend all wounds, and do my job of making you continue to love our OTP.

Love,
Almy Rose
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