So I have a book. And in one of the male characters is pretty smart, good looking, grounded in his faith. You know, all things a smart person would want in a man.
One of the lines asked him why he didn't have a girlfriend. A reader suggested they weren't surprised because he is a dork.
Now I have in mind what I think a dork is but I said, let me go look it up. The dictionary calls a dork a socially inept person. Basically a socially awkward person.
Nothing about my character suggest that he is that. I was upset about comment not because it was about my book. But because it speaks to a larger issue of women and girls choosing me.
I'm sorry. I have always been attracted to well dressed, well educated, men who are grounded in faith. But I have heard so many women call men who fit this bill, like maybe a Jidenna or Russell Wilson lame.
How is it lame that a man is educated? How is it lame that a man loves you and is willing to do anything for you and treat you right like Russell does Ciara?
I have friends that consistently choose the Futures over Russel Wilsons because they complain the Russels are lame. Yet constantly complain they are treated wrong.
Hey maybe if you gave a Russel a chance over a Future you'd spend less nights crying and more time smiling.
I'm not saying Future is bad and Russell is all good. But what I am
Saying is that we as women and girls have to stop think less of men who have all the qualities they should, and think more of men who treat us like shit. That is so fucking backwards.
I don't know who taught women and girls to think like that. But you need to unlearn that shit. Super quick. It's a ignorant way of thinking. And you consistently settle for a man who treats you like less, all because you don't want to date a "lame."
What the fuck? I can't.
