Let Her Go (girlxgirl) (lesbian story)

Chapter Sixty-two

A/n: I know it's been really serious lately so I tried to make this one a little fluffy. I'm not sure if it worked because I've not been in a fluffy mood recently (can you tell? ;P) but I HOPE YOU GUYS STILL ENJOY IT! Love you all!

Robyn

Two days after my unplanned admittance to the hospital I was allowed to leave again. It wasn't the most relieved I'd ever been but it sure came close: being cooped up inside for so long hadn't been fun, even with my friends trying to entertain me.

There was only so much you could do while still obeying the (absolutely terrifying) nurses and we'd burned through it all on the first day. I'd cried, until I was told off for being too noisy, Sabby and I had made out, until we were informed that such behaviour would not be tolerated, and even a harmless game of chess was stopped when a stout, middle-aged woman confiscated it for being a 'choking' hazard, as though I were two years old. It riled me.

But there were no hard feelings as I left: I waved to all the nurses and smiled until my cheeks ached. It was a good ache - the ache of freedom! The nurses waved back and even returned the chess set, although a rook had mysteriously disappeared. It was never found.

Sabby carried the board under her arm, alongside my overnight bag. I'd tried reasonably hard to take something but she refused and I'll admit I enjoyed it. Maybe I should hire someone to carry my stuff all the time, it rocked! Of course, I couldn't afford anything like that, nor justify needing it, but I wondered if Sabby could; she ran in a higher circle than me, personal stuff-carriers were probably the norm there! I broached the question but she just laughed, which I took as a no. I was only a little disappointed. There were other things to get excited about: seeing Zoey and Jonas, eating edible food and being able to kiss my girlfriend without reproval - so laziness was quickly forgotten.

The first two items on the list were waiting for us outside the hospital. My eyes fell upon Zoey almost instantly and I let out a gasp worthy of a pantomime performer before breaking into a run. Upon collision, I enveloped her in my arms and held on tightly, fighting against the pinprick of tears. She clutched me just as roughly and I whispered apologies as though they were a magic spell to make what had happened disappear.

She grew tense and pushed me away, albeit gently.

"I told you not to do that."

"Yes, you did, but I think the situation calls for an apology. It was so fucked." Zoey's glare was serious and I didn't want to do anything further to annoy or upset her so I said, "Let me at least express the wish that I'd been more open and that I'd told you sooner. Not just you, everyone," I met Jonas's eyes, then Sabastienne's. "I should have trusted you and shared my problems, not hidden them - I feel extremely guilty for doing so ... I acknowledge and accept my erroneous ways with a heavy heart."

"Shut up, you idiot," Jonas said. "Are you trying to sound Victorian?"

"Indeed not, my young fellow, I was merely attempting to express my sincerest emotions in a manner which did not allow the use of thoughtless phrases, such as one might utter without realising and offend one's friends."

"Seriously, shut it," Zoey said. She had relaxed despite her words, which pleased me so much I obliged and bit my tongue. "You don't have to apologise, no matter how fucked a situation gets. It isn't your fault."

"Eh."

"What?"

"It's kind of my fault. I'm the one who made whatever this is worse by not doing something about it."

"Lots of people are afraid to-"

"Yeah, but lots of people doing something doesn't mean I have an excuse," I said. My stomach churned. "I have to accept that it's partially my fault for not seeking help and I'm okay with that," I spoke louder when both Zoey and Sabastienne opened their mouths to contradict me. "Really, I'm fine, at least it didn't go so far that I really did anything, yeah?" I smiled, trying to lighten the mood. "Anyway, we're not going to talk about this. Did you bring what I wanted?"