Let Her Go (girlxgirl) (lesbian story)

Chapter Sixty-seven

Robyn

"One, two, three, drink!" I downed a shot and shuddered, the caustic drink burning my throat. The room swam.

"I'm out," I spluttered, staggering up.

Charlotte grabbed my hand, "No! You can't let Baste win!"

"Okay," I slurred, thudding down onto my ass. Another shot was poured and I put my fingers on the sticky glass, waiting for the call. When it came, I braced myself and swallowed, fighting my entire body to keep the liquid down. "This isn't fair! I'm unaccustomed to drinking and she has genetics on her side," I pointed an accusing finger in the vague direction of Sabastienne.

"Nothing I can do about that Robbie!"

"I'm going to beat you."

"You're going to end up in the ER."

"Just you wait." I grabbed yet another tiny glass but my fingers were clumsy and disobedient so half the vodka spilt onto the floor. "Fuck."

"Why don't we call a truce?" Sabby suggested. "I don't think you can go on much longer."

"I'm fine. You scared, Sloan?"

"Absolutely terrified."

I crawled across what had once been a drinking circle but now contained only myself, Baste and Charlotte as some sort of referee. Little plastic shot glasses crunched under me but I barely noticed, determined to reach the beautiful girl swaying and doubling in my vision. She held her arms out and helped guide me. I positioned myself in her lap, arms around her, kissing her wetly on the cheek, her warm breath brushing against my ear. Her her her. It was all about her; always was, always would be.

"I love you," I whispered.

"What?"

"I LOVE YOU!" The shout was so loud it hurt even my ears.

"Shut up, Bobbin, no one cares!" Jonas yelled.

"Get back to screwing Zoey," I retorted.

The best friend in question piped up: "That's a great idea!"

"I love you more," said Sabastienne, distracting me from everything else. Her fingers brushed along the line of my cheekbone and down my philtrum to outline my lips. "This won't convince me to let you win though, no matter how cute you are." She grinned, white teeth flashing, a hint of pink tongue glistening behind. I touched the tip of her nose and smiled goofily back.

"S'okay, I already won when I got you."

"You're not the only one." We stared into each other's eyes like lovesick idiots. "But I want to talk to you about something important," she stood, helping me up too, "we have to go somewhere a little more private."

Outside, the breeze tickled my face and exposed arms but I didn't feel cold as we walked hand in hand through the compound. Lights on the walls lit up an area of grass in the centre of the school, designed as natural relief from the stresses of lessons. It was empty.

We settled down on the earth, her lying back, me on my side. The stars weren't out yet, in fact the sky was only just growing dark. Clouds scudded by, bright wisps of white, some bathed salmon-pink and orange by the setting sun. But I didn't notice any of that, focused instead on the rising and falling chest of the girl beside me.

Correction: woman; she most definitely wasn't a girl. I leered.

Being outside had sobered me up enough that there were no longer two of her and the world had ceased blurring alarmingly whenever I moved, but it hadn't made me delicate: when I kissed her, our teeth smashed together and an iron tang filled my mouth. Luckily, it was only my blood. I'd cut my lip. She soothed it with her fingertips and nothing hurt anymore so I kissed her again. This time was gentle, soft, her lips firm against mine, moving in motions we'd practised over the months of our relationship. Our breath mingled, tongues sliding slowly together, sensually, almost lovingly, if such a thing can be said about making-out.

I pulled back. The heat of my love for her pounded through me and stared at her a second, then kissed the side of her neck. I tasted, bit, suck, below and slightly further back than her left ear, determined to give her something to remember me by. Something noticeable.

"Ow," she groaned, not making any move to stop me. I grinned against her flushed skin, feeling the excited pulse of her neck against my lips. She pushed me onto my back gently, flipped herself over on top, leg between my thighs. My eyes widened. "What?" she smirked.

"We're outside. In the middle of school. Anyone could come upon us."

"Only one person's going to be cumming tonight."

"Oh," I gasped, "who?"

"Me. Get to work." She threw herself onto the ground with a thump, laughing at her own joke.

"You're such an idiot sometimes."

"I know." 

Our noses slid against each other as we kissed again. It quickly became hot and steamy, as so often happened when I had someone this sexy this close to me. Knowing now that that was our last kiss, I wouldn't change a thing. It was perfect and it was us and nothing could've made it better.

Her hand went under my shirt. Then she stopped moving. Went limp.

I thought she was teasing at first. Tilted my head back just a little to look at her.

"Sabby, stop kidding around." I touched her neck, her face. "Baby?" She didn't move. Didn't respond. "Sabastienne this isn't funny!" I peered into her face. Her eyes were shut, I touched one of the eyelids and she didn't flinch. Pulling it up, her eye was glazed over, she didn't see a thing. I put a hand on her chest. Nothing. No rise and fall no steady thump thump to assure me of the life within. That was when I screamed. 

Panic flooded my veins, my heart felt like it was about to burst and I couldn't breathe, I couldn't breathe but I had to because I was the only one here. I wrestled with my pockets. No phone. I got up screamed for someone to help looked around no one so I ran and ran and ran back to our room hating that I'd left her but wanting her to stay with me - I didn't abandon you baby I promise I just went to get help. I burst in and grabbed Charlotte, Charlotte was sober, dragged her outside shouting to call an ambulance pulled her to Baste. Begged her to do something.

She knelt. Felt her wrist, opened her mouth, peered inside. Starting pressing down on her chest. Something inside me was ripping open a gap in my chest so I'd never be whole again and I collapsed down everything swimming and distorting and going black; this wasn't happening this couldn't be happening it couldn't wasn't wouldn't, would never how could - how...

Sabastienne was dead.