The Gang Leader And His Moon - A 2Moons FF

Chapter 78. Can we talk?

Beam's POV

"Okay so here you.....and what you do is....got it? eam....BEAM!"

"I'm awake!" I jump up when Phana growls out my name.

"Barely. N'Beam, i think we should end it here today."

"N-no, P'Pha i can continue don't worry."

"Ai'Beam, look at yourself. You're slouching, you're pale, have giant bags under your eyes and your attention span is getting shorter every passing minute."

"No P'Pha i'm fine."

"No you aren't, and i am not fine with you lying to me."

"I'm not lying!" I shout angrily, good thing i asked him to study outside today instead of the library. We have been quite loud today. Suddenly his grabs the collar of my shirt and pulls me closer to his face, only an inch or something apart. I try to stay angry but after looking him in the eyes by resolve starts to crumble and i began to feel fear. P'Phana is usually very tolerant with me, even more so after dating N'Yo but he still can't stand being disrespected and lied to. I have done both to him very frequently but he always made clear that i was about to cross the line and i respected that, but i guess that my fatigue kind of blurred out that line.

"..-m sorry..." I mumble out looking at the ground in shame. He sighs and lets go of my shirt, straightening my shirt again and fixing my collar.

"Beam why are you doing this to yourself. You will pass without studying like that. The effort you normally put in was enough to pass."

"Yeah, but i was never this close to losing my scholarship." He sighs and flicks my forehead. I glare at him, holding my forehead while he just looks at me like i am an idiot.

"Why are you still so bothered by that? I've told you before that i am your friend and will have your back if you ever need me, emotionally, physically or financially i don't mind."

"I don't want to burden you even further, you already helped me enough with my brothers in the past."

"Oh my god....Beam, you are slowly killing yourself for nothing. Both me and Ai'Ming have no problem paying for your shit. Get that in your head!"

"It's okay Phi, only 1 exam left and after that i will go back to normal."

"Wait...have you actually spent any time with Ming this week?" Sadly and filled with shame i shake my head no and without saying anything P'Pha stands up and starts putting away his stuff.

"P'Pha...?"

"Beam. I have to go, because the longer i hear you out the angrier i get and I don't want to do something i will regret later."

"Phi what do you mean?" I ask already knowing what he means.

"You are swallowing in self pity. You have been avoiding N'Ming for almost an entire week. How is he supposed to feel? That you don't trust him? That you don't want to depent on each other? That you are bored with him?" His voice gradually got louder and angrier as he spoke but before he continued he took a deep breath with his eyes closed to calm himself, P'Pha no longer looked anywhere as angry as before but more apologetic. "Nong, i almost lost Yo because of mistakes i created. Don't do the same thing with Ming. You are one of the few people i care about and i really don't want you to go through the same shit as me. I hope you will take my advice." And with that he left. I just sat there looking up at the sky, contemplating his words. He was kind of right. I thought avoiding everyone else to focus on my studies was the best thing to do, even though i could most likely still keep my scholarship with a little bit more effort than normal. I didn't even account for Ming's feelings.