The Advice Column III

482

Advice Request
This person is in a bit of a dilemma and doesn't know what to do.

Answered Submission
Hi,

First of all, like you've said, it's not wrong that you want to be together and it should never feel wrong.

Do you know how her parents feel about same sex relationships? Talk to her about it all. It's great that you managed to tell her how you felt about her, and that she feels the same way, so talk to her about how you're feeling. Find out how her parents feel about it all.

There's no need to rush coming out. You've trusted your friend with this information and that's great, she can be your go to person if you need it. If and when you're ready to come out, you need a little support group that you can turn to, especially since you've mentioned homophobic parents and religion, so finding out her parents views is good just in case you need them.

I think a good thing here is that you're best friends, which means hanging out together and spending time with each other shouldn't spark any suspicions with anyone. So things can still be kind of similar to how they used to be. However, wanting things to go back to the way they were isn't going to happen since you've both admitted to liking each other.

You should definitely talk to her. Tell her how you're feeling, tell her about how you're worried: mention your parents and religion. I'm sure she'll understand and be supportive.

I understand how much this can be confusing, but try not to let the confusion effect what is important, and that is your friendship. Above everything else, your friendship is most important. Everything else will find a way of working itself out.

I hope this helps.
The Advice Column Team