The Advice Column III

521

Advice Request

The requestor is scared to ask their crush out.

Answered Submission

Hello again!

Crushes suck, to put it bluntly. I'm sure every person in the history of the world can attest to this. Having strange feelings for a person is not easy, and it can be so hard to understand sometimes. The question is: how do we deal with it?

Here's the thing: everyone deals with crushes differently. Some people back off from their crush or ignore them completely. Others talk to them as often as they can. Some begin to obsess over their crush. This is almost all fine and good, but the trick is finding a healthy outlet for these emotions.

Another thing: you have to release those pent up emotions or else they'll accumulate until they collapse—and that is not a pretty picture. As with everything in life, you have to find a healthy outlet whether it be venting to a friend, writing in a diary or journal, exercising, or whatever else you choose. As long as it is a positive release of emotions, it works.

Now the million dollar question: should you ask out your crush? That, my friend, is up to you. If you like him and if you can see you two together, go for it. If not, then let him go, and move on. Of course, as long as he is a positive person in your life, continue to be his friend if you're on that level. But if not, then you have to choose whether to put yourself out there or not.

Putting yourself out there is not an easy thing to do. It is daunting and difficult, and it takes a lot of courage most of the time. Should this scary idea stop you? Absolutely not. I'm going to be honest with you: he may reject you. He may see you as just a friend or just a girl from school, and you have to prepare yourself for that. Here's the thing though: there is a possibility of a negative outcome in every situation we will ever go through. We can't let that possibility get in the way of living our lives. So, sure, if you think you two would be good together and if you would like to pursue something with him, then go for it. Let him know how you feel, or maybe ask if he would be up to seeing a movie sometime. My suggestion if you do ask him out is to be very casual at first. Don't go into it expecting this fairy tale romance right off the bat. Start by being cool, casual, and most importantly, yourself.

Lastly, I advise you to be open to the possibility of rejection. I hate to be a killjoy, but we have to be open minded. Things don't always work out the way we would like, but that doesn't mean we should give up completely. Be prepared, but don't give up.

I hope this helped, girly!

Stay strong,

The Advice Column Team