ㅡ Taehyung's POV ㅡ
There is a song that says:
"Don't you ever tame your demons but always keep them on leash."
Reader, you wondering what my demons are, right?
My demons...
Generally, I can ignore them, but sometimes they are behind me, always in ambush. Ready to tear me down when I slightly lower my defense. I can also count them.
1,2,3 ...
All behind my shoulders, I see them out of the corner of my eye.
My demons are always on a leash. But it wasn't always like that, one of them was released when Chaerin abandoned me. Her abandoning opened a wound that I had long since closed, stitched day after day.
The abandonment of my mom.
She also abandoned my father and me when I was younger. She never returned. I don't know if she's alive, what she's doing if she thinks of me. But I don't even care, I hate her. I can't forgive her, she hurt my father and me.
The day she left, I remember it as if it had happened yesterday, I was behind her curved shoulders as she packed the suitcase, I remember that she cried silently, but I heard her sobs.
The innocent me didn't understand then, I asked her where she was going, she replied that it was a surprise and left me a letter to give to my father. Before leaving, she kissed my forehead and then closed the door behind her and never opened it again. I don't know why she did it.
But it was hard to bear when I realized that she would never return.
That pain was brought back to the surface by Chaerin left. I loved her, so much. Like I loved my mother. Then boom, both abandoned me.
I happen to dream of that mother who was with me, that mother who stroked my hair while humming a lullaby. I still feel her warmth when I dream. I wish I could feel her one last time; I happen to hope for it. But soon after, those dreams splashed with memories turn into nightmares.
That is my first demon.
《Taehyung?》
《Mh?》 I look up from my drawing.
《Were you listening to me?》
Ah, Belle ... Belle is beautiful, intelligent, good under the bedsheets. But she talks too much. I also love to talk, but there are times when I want only silence. No sound. And now it was one of those moments, but Belle had other thoughts.
I had no idea what she was talking about.
《Yes, I was listening to you.》
She crosses her arms under her breast.
《Oh yes? About what was I talking about?》
I beat the pencil on my chin.
《About how you want to be fucked on the kitchen table again.》
She smiles closing her eyes.
《No, but yes.》
She approaches me and in her hoarse voice asks me.
《Are you proposing it?》
《No, but yes.》
She moves her body close to me, sits on the armrests, but her gaze changes, her attention is drawn towards my lap.
《What does it represent?》 The tips of her fingers touch the gray lines that my pencil has released.
《My demons.》
YOU ARE READING
𝑱𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝑺𝒆𝒙, 𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕? ➳ 𝑴𝒂𝒌𝒏𝒂𝒆 𝑳𝒊𝒏𝒆 🔞
Fanfiction[English is not my first language, sorry for any grammatical error.] It all starts from a simple dare. Chaerin likes to play with them. Taehyung, Jimin and Jungkook, will they play along? What will happen if they all join the game? It's supposed to...
