They Will Go Down In History (Remus x OC) Book 2

Chapter 53

"Do you think by any chance I can finally go and pick up a new wand?"

"Not on your own Viel," Lily disagreed,

"But MOOOMMM!" I mocked,

"Enough," she chuckled, "you may be walking again but your wounds aren't fully healed, I'll come with you, we can go this afternoon,"

"What's the catch?" I narrowed my eyes at her,

"I'd really appreciate it if you came had tea with-"

"NO!" I cut her off,

"Viel! Don't interrupt me while I'm speaking!"

"what so you can finish you sentence? Asking me to go have tea with Remus!"

"And us! And Siruis! Come on it's been since our wedding that we haven't been able to all hang out together! Please, for me?"

"that's not long enough!"

"Viel ! The last time you saw Remus was 3 weeks ago, can you not put a little effort in to just hang around him for one hour, you don't have to talk to him, just be in the same room,"

"Fine!" I finally gave in, "but we'll be going to dinner together at a restaurant I pick,"

"fine by me,"

"and you pay,"

"oh you play dirty,"

This is awkward, I thought as I sat across the table from Remus. I don't think I'm the only one that finds this awkward either.

No one was really talking, morely just enjoying the cookies lily made. Why didn't we go out to a tea shop? Why did it have to be here at James's and lily's? Now I can't escape by pretending to go to the bathroom or some shit.

Though that wasn't really going to stop me, "excuse me a second as I go to the bathroom,"

I couldn't jump out the window but at least it gave me a few minutes of peace, that was a start.

As slowly as humanly possible, I washed my hands in the sink as the draw out the time I had before returning to the dining room.

This sucked, why did I accept? I couldn't face Remus, I just couldn't. I had been overthinking the same questions over and over again and in the end, I always ended up with the same answers.

I sighed as I unlocked the bathroom door preparing to go back.

"Oh Viel,"

"Remus," I wasn't prepared yet!! I needed a little more than that to put on a composed expression.

"Sorry, I thought you would have been done,"

"where else would I be?"

"your room?"

What that was an option!? I could have just left! "oh, well no,"

"Listen Viel,"

"Okay it was nice talking to you bye!"

"Viel !" he grabbed my wrist and stopped me straight in my tracks,

"What do you want Remus,"

"you know what," he slowly released his grib, "it doesn't matter, if you're not ready to talk,"

But I was, I just didn't want to have to say it. I don't want to do the same thing he did to me. But maybe doing this, making him wait was cruel.

This is probably for the best, "Remus, there's something I need to tell you,"

"I also really need to talk to you but I'll wait for when you're ready to hear it,"

"What's that supposed to mean? You have more bad news for me?"

"No Viel that's not what I meant!"

"cause whatever you need to say can't be worse than what you've already said,"

"I know, that's why I want to explain myself,"

"Explain. Explain. Right, you mean find yourself an excuse."

"No!"

"what about sorry!? Shouldn't that be what comes first?"

"Viel I'm sorry!" he raised his hands in defeat, his tone of voice growing louder and more aggravated,

"wow thanks Remus, I really felt the  sincerity in your tone of voice, passive-aggressive definitely makes it sound like you're sorry,"

"what do you want from me? I know I messed up but I'm trying everything I can to try and make up for it! I'm leaving you space, I'm leaving you time even though it keeps me up at night. I never hear from you so I don't even know if you're doing okay, to hell! I didn't even know whether your wounds had gotten better or not because you refuse to be with a 10 foot radius of me! "

"And whose fault could that be!"

"Mine!" I hadn't expected for him to say that, "it's my fault okay! But that doesn't change the fact that I still love you and care about you,"

"Well what you said changed how I feel about you,"

He bit his lip in pain from what I had just said, "Okay,"

"You were right!" I shrugged putting on the most painful smile I had ever experienced, "I do want children, I hadn't realized it till you made it obliviously clear that if I stayed with you, I couldn't have that. Now," I pushed away the hair in front of my face, using it as an excuse to break eye contact with him, "All I can think about is all the things I'm going to miss out on if I stay with you,"

"Go on," Remus mumbled, just as heartbroken as I was that night in the forest, "just say it, get it over with,"

"I'm sorry," I cried,

"JUST SAY IT GODDAMMIT!" He punched the wall, scaring me into taking two steps back,

"Remus, we're over, I'm done,"