From Barcelona To...

Chapter 119 - Let Me Love You

1 month later...

Ellies P.O.V

"He's asleep" I say to Leah as I walk into the kitchen

"Took a while" Leah smiles softly

"Yeah, rambling away he was"

"I'd love to know what he thinks he's trying to say" Leah laughs softly

"He's definitely going to be a chatter box" I laugh "I also realised something the other day"

"What?"

"My son is gonna have a southern accent!" I face palm myself

"That's because he is a southerner" Leah laughs

"Criminal"

Our laughs soon die down as an awkward silence fills the air.

"I'll er...see you tomorrow then" I smile softly

"Yeah" Leah smiles as she rests her chin on her hand

"Before I go...I just wanted to say thank you"

"For what?"

"For letting me still do this"

"Ellie, I would never stop you from seeing him"

"I know, but..." I stutter "Err...I appreciate it"

Leah replies with a soft smile, but I can see the tears starting to build up in her eyes. I can't handle seeing her cry again "See you tomorrow" I spin around and leave.

Leave?...

Flashback:

A few days had passed since our huge, blazing argument which ended up in me storming out. I checked into a hotel and decided to stay there for a few nights, giving both Leah and I some much needed space. The last thing I wanted was to go back and us continue to argue. I maybe shouldn't have pushed her like I did, but I needed her to say it. I had been thinking it and it was eating me up inside. I don't know why but I just needed her to admit it, even though it devastated me. I had gone back to see Archie and pick up some stuff but Leah and I barely spoke one word to each other, it was definitely frosty between us, but it only confirmed the thoughts I had been having whilst I was alone in the hotel, well, even before then. It was the last thing I ever wanted, it is the last thing I want, but I know deep down it has to be done. For all of us.

——

"Can we err...talk?" I ask, as Leah returns to the kitchen having put Archie down for a nap

"Mmhmm" Leah mutters as she takes a seat opposite me

"I err..." I shuffle around in my seat, not knowing how to actually say this "I err...."

"You're not coming home are you?"

I sigh as I cover my face with my hands, I can feel the tears building in my eyes "No" I whisper as I look up at Leah, tears filling her eyes as mine connect with hers

"Why?" Leah whispers, the tears slowly start streaming down her face which breaks my heart

"I feel...I feel like we are both in a pressure cooker right now"

Leah doesn't say anything.

"One of us needs to step back and I think you know that, don't you?"

"Do you still love me?"

"Leah..." I stand up and walk over to her, I gently pull her to her feet and wrap my arms around her "Of course I still love you" I hold her tight "But...I don't want us to forget"