Fallin' All In You; Shawn Mendes

Twenty-Two

Chapter 22

If you'll have me

"I wouldn't want to bother you like that."

•••

Peyton

I never did have a genuine boyfriend growing up. They were all the same, they either wanted my virginity, to use me for sex, or because of my money. There was not one that wanted me because of who I was as a person. That's what made me feel guarded and not want to fall in love. But of course I also came to the conclusion that no one will love me for me.

So I of course eventually lost my virginity. I have slept with a couple guys, one I regret because he was my boss. But I don't regret it as much now, yes my life could've been completely different. Though I could never regret my baby, things change when you're pregnant. But that's besides the point.

The point is, it was hard to find someone genuine. Someone who liked me because of who I was and not my family name or because they wanted to have sex with me.

And well this is where things got confusing for me.

•••

"Dinner was delicious. Thank you, both of you." Shawn said as he looked from Madison and I.

"You are very welcome." I told him.

I then stood up and gathered my plate and his but he was too quick. He snatched his plate away from me and walked with me to the kitchen. Madison and Jayden, her boyfriend, still sat at the table talking.

"It really was all delicious." Shawn told me as he stood next to me by the sink.

I laughed as I started doing the dishes, "Thank you, was it better than pizza?" I asked.

Shawn shrugged, I dropped my jaw and lightly hit him with my arm. He chuckled before putting his hands up in surrender.

"I was just joking, of course pizza is always good. It was nice to have an actual thanksgiving meal." He told me as he helped put the dishes away after I washed them.

I smiled, "Yeah I guess it's just weird not doing it with family huh?"

I knew Shawn was away from his family as well. They were still in Toronto while he was here in California. It can't be easy, I'm sure he has the money or time to go so I'm not sure why he hadn't. I figured it wasn't my place to ask or question, he'd tell me if he truly wanted to.

"Yeah, why didn't you go to your family?" He asked as he dried the wet plate with a dish cloth to dry.

I sighed, "Well because big holidays like these are so hectic. It's not just family that's there, it's like distant family and like wealthy friends. I'm sure she invited the whole neighborhood and well I can't handle that. At least not anymore."

Shawn nodded his head, "Yeah sounds like a lot of stress which isn't good for the baby."

"Yeah and my mom doesn't even know about that either. Imagine the heart attack id give her if I showed up pregnant?" I asked while laughing which caused the corner of Shawn's lips to twitch upward.