Fallin' All In You; Shawn Mendes

Fifty-Four

Chapter 54

Halloween

"Thats okay."

•••

October

Peyton

Disappointment. Sadness. Anger. Relief. Reassurance. Love. Happiness. All of the emotions I felt in a day.

•••

Halloween, one of my favorite holidays. One was Christmas and the other was the Fourth of July. That one became a favorite of mine two years ago. But I loved Halloween maybe just as much as I loved Christmas. The decorations, the costumes, and the movies. Shawn and I had taken Melody to a pumpkin patch a few weeks ago. We carved the pumpkins and put them in front of the house. We also decorated the outside and inside of the house.

"Momma! We are all dressed up." I heard shawn call from outside.

I was brought out of my thoughts and finished using the bathroom before I walked to the sink. I washed up and walked to the door then opened it. I forced a smile when I seen my two loves. Shawn was dressed like Prince Charming and we found this cute Cinderella dress for Melody. It fit with her blonde hair.

"Wow you two look so cute." I told them.

"Mama." Melody said in her cute little voice.

"What baby?" I asked as I walked towards her.

She then started 'talking' but it was mostly babble. She knows more words and has been mimicking us. Melody has become quite the chatter box and I absolutely love it. I felt Shawn's stare but he didn't say anything.

"Mel go get your bucket, show Momma." Shawn told her as he set her down.

We watched as she ran as fast as her little legs could take her. She disappeared into her room. I kept my eyes on the door but I could see Shawn shift.

"Peyton?" He said my name in a question.

I hesitated looking at him but I did, "Yeah?"

"What's wrong? I knew there was something off when you walked out of the bathroom." Shawn told me.

I shrugged, "It's nothing."

"Peyton, just tell me." He said trying to get me to talk.

I wrapped my arms around myself, "Nothing. I got my period." I said biting the inside of my cheek.

I could feel the knot start to grow in my throat. Tears pricked the back of my eyes. We had been trying for a baby since June. Five months, each one obviously ending with my period starting. I know it could take time but it took one time with Melody.

I was disappointed. Not because I haven't gotten pregnant yet. Well in a way yes, but it was only because I wasn't giving him what he wanted. More kids, kids that were all his. That's what hurt the most.

"That's okay." Was all he said as he stepped towards me trying to reach out to me.

I moved a little away and looked at him, "Is it?"