Saving the Broken (Connor x Deviant!Reader)

Chapter 167

You and Connor clung onto each other for a long time. You were just so happy that neither of you wanted to leave. You both wanted it to last forever. One thing was for certain though, this was the beginning of your own forever that you both planned on spending together. Forever. You thought as you kissed him with so much love. I'll love you forever. 

When you both pulled away, you looked into each other's eyes. Stars made each of your eyes twinkle and glitter under the lights. You smiled at him and he had the exact same smile on his own lips. Connor let out another breathy laugh of disbelief.

"This...this is real." He said quietly. You smiled softly at him.

"Yes, it is." You whispered.

"You're mine and always will be now."

"Always." You confirmed. Tears slid down his face.

"I love you." He said with a quivering smile. He was having trouble staying calm. Feeling so much emotion at once was overwhelming him. You kissed them away, your hands cupping both sides of his face.

"I love you too, Connor." You told him with a smile. "I will always love you." He lifted one hand to cup yours. You smiled, blushing at the touch. Connor pulled you into his lap and he turned his head so he could kiss you again. Your arms wrapped your his neck, kissing back as you used him to keep yourself up. He didn't mind at all, supporting your body with his arms as well.

"I'll never leave you again, my love." He whispered.

"I know." You whispered back. 

You both kissed for another long while. After that, you both collapsed together, lying there with you resting your head on his chest and listening to his heart pound strongly against your ear. It was comforting in a way.

"I remember the day I met you. You were so fascinating to me. I had never heard your name and yet something about you just made me glad that you were joining Hank and I." You smiled.

"I remember thinking that you were proper yet so curious. It was a combination I'd never seen before, but I liked it and I remember struggling to hide my blush from you." You said.

"I remember how I used to wonder why I was becoming addicted to you. I couldn't answer my own question if my life depended on it. Now I can, but then...everything as such a mystery to me."

"It was for me too. I didn't understand how I could fall for you. You were programmed to hunt deviants and I was a deviant myself, but I wasn't afraid that you'd turn me in. I just wanted to be with you and help you. I didn't want to lie to you and I felt bad having no choice but to do exactly that. I'm still sorry I never told you the truth until..." You sighed a bit. He ran his hand through your hair, comforting you.

"I'm sorry I caused you such pain when Oreon attempted to destroy me. I wasn't thinking it all through. I refused to connect the pieces, not wanting to believe that it had been a lie and that I'd have to turn you in. I hated the idea. I didn't want to bring you in knowing you would be killed. I wanted to protect you. I wanted to feel that feeling I had when you first kissed me. I wanted it to be true. I wanted to believe that I could love you." He said.

"I wanted to believe that too. I wanted to believe that you could love me even though it was against your program and it would be a distraction from your mission. It's why I kissed you. I wanted you to become like me, but I was such an idiot when I got mad at you. I should've listened to you. I was just so mad at myself, thinking I was such an idiot to trust my own feelings and thoughts. I was so mad at myself for seemingly being wrong about you. It made me feel so stupid and useless. It wasn't you I was mad at. Not really, anyway. I was just being so cruel to myself that it was instantly directed toward you instead. After that, I just felt so lifeless. I felt like I was truly a machine. That the life and light had left me. When you told me that you loved me after risking your own life to save mine, I felt all of the returning. I felt so amazing knowing I hadn't been wrong about you. Knowing it was possible for us to be together after all. Knowing that you had actually been in love with me."

"I suppose each of us had to go through the pain to become who we are together now. Each of us had to change in order to be together. You had to be broken in order to leave me. You had to leave me in order for me to truly begin to deviate and regret what I was doing. You had to cause me to doubt myself to be confident in my final choice. The choice to go after you. The choice to live my own life." You smiled.

"Each of us had to break each other in order to save each other." You said.

"Indeed." He agreed.

"Well, being broken is worth it if I get to be with you now."

"It will always be worth it if I can be in your arms again." He agreed.

"Through the pain,"

"we will always find each other again."

"Always."

"Always."

"I love you, Connor."

"I love you too, (Y/n)."