Despondency (Sequel To Sweetheart)

Chapter 50 - Killing Me Softly

October 15, 1999

Ginuwine/ Mariah's Setting

"Happy Birthday baby", Mariah smiled as she kissed Ginuwine on the cheek.

Today was Ginuwine's 31st birthday and instead of hanging out with Tim and Static for the evening, he decided to be with Mariah at the institution.

"Thanks Mimi", he said as he kissed her back.

"I wish I could've gotten you a gift", Mariah whined.

"You did get me a gift", Ginuwine grinned.

"Then where is it?", Mariah said with arched eyebrows.

"Right here", Ginuwine as he rubbed his hand across her baby bump causing her to grin widely.

"I can't believe our angels are going to be here in a few months. You don't know how excited I am to meet our babies", Mariah said.

"Yeah...hopefully you'll be my wife by then", Ginuwine said with urgency in his voice as he looked at Mariah.

"I will", Mariah smiled weakly. "....but there's some things you need to know before we make that step", she said nervously.

"Okay", Ginuwine said curiously as he turned to face her.

"Now I don't know how you're going to take this but if you don't take it well, you have the option of walking out of that door and never seeing me again", Mariah said as she pointed towards the doorway.

"I'm not just going to abandon you. You're carrying my babies for goodness sakes. What is this about anyways?", Ginuwine said with confusion.

"There's some things that you don't know about me Ginuwine and I feel horrible for stringing you along all this time", Mariah said trying to remain serious but her emotions were trying to get the best of her.

"Tell me", he pleaded.

"I-...I'm damaged goods", Mariah cried.

"No you aren't....what are you talking about?"

"I can't love you how I want to because my past won't let me. I'm afraid that if you marry me, then you're going to change into a bad person and I can't do it", she cried.

"Explain."

Mariah began to tell him everything she told Dr. Curie about her childhood and past abusive relationships. She even told him about the many times that she was violently raped and forced to participate in orgys. She told tales about the many times that she had gotten pregnant from being raped and how Tommy would literally beat the babies out of her.

By the time she was finished talking, she could barely speak. She was crying so hard that Ginuwine had to hold her.

"Shhh calm down Mimi", he said as rubbed her back.

"I-I c-can't. All t-those things were the reason why I wanted kill myself. I've been getting violated all my life and I can't take it anymore. After Tommy violated me again two months ago, I just wanted end it all", Mariah sobbed as she held on tightly to her. "I feel like burned out whore."