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Chapter 13: Matt Needs Help

Cameron's POV

I've never dealt with grief before. When I got that phone call from Taylor, I went into shock. I never knew Matt was suicidal. I also felt a sense of betrayal. Matt was my best friend. I was angry at him for not telling me that there was anything wrong, but also angry at myself for not noticing. I was so consumed in the whole Nash thing that I looked past Matt completely.

Nash had accompanied me to the hospital. I didn't look and or talk to him. I was only concerned about Matt. Matt was all I cared about at this point.

When we got to the hospital, the doctors wouldn't tell us anything. I sat in the waiting room with Taylor and Nash. Nash looked calm. Taylor was hysterical. And I didn't really know how I felt. It was silent for a very long time. The only sounds coming from nurses or doctors walking past. I decided to speak.

"Did you find him?" I asked Taylor. Taylor wiped away a tear and sniffled.

"Uh yeah.." his voice was shaky. He took a deep breath in and his voice hitched.

"I... I went over to his place... to talk about some things... his mom let me in. I went upstairs and..." he trailed off. Tears were streaming down his face. I went over to him and engulfed him in a hug.

"It's okay." I said over and over again. I looked down the hall.

I could see Mrs and Mr Espinosa sitting on chairs in the hallway. They looked devastated. Mrs Espinosa was in tears and Mr Espinosa showed no sign of emotion. I can only imagine what they're going through. I felt Nash take my hand into his. He smiled at me. It was nice. I felt a great sense of comfort. I really needed it right now.

I saw a doctor approach Mr and Mrs Espinosa. He told them something, I could not make out what it was. I saw Mr and Mrs Espinosa get up and hug each other. Mrs Espinosa cried tears of joy. They spoke for a while. Then, Mr and Mrs Espinosa went into the hospital room.

The doctor then started walking towards us. Taylor was the first to get up, followed by myself and Nash.

"You're here for a Matthew Espinosa correct?" he asked while checking his clipboard. "Is he okay?" Taylor asked with urgency.

"Yes, yes. Mr Espinosa is alright. He suffered major blood loss though. He is currently under, but will be awake soon. I spoke to his parents, and counselling is definitely something that needs to be considered after he recovers." he paused.

"You don't have anything to do with this do you boys?" he asked while eyeing us.

"No! I was the one who found him!" Taylor exclaimed.

"I was unaware that he was unhappy in the first place." I added and Nash nodded.

"Well then you don't happen to know anything else that could have maybe caused it?" the doctor asked. A look of guilt washed on my face.

"You know we don't take kindly on suicide here. We are constantly fighting for peoples lives, and see innocent people being robbed of their lives everyday. To us suicide is considered selfish. But I do understand. I would really like to ensure that Mr Espinosa is taken care of once he leaves this facility. " he said. You could hear the sincerity in his voice.

"You can go see him now, but only two at a time aloud in the room. His parents are currently in there so you will have to wait outside." he said. We nodded and walked over to the seats next to the hospital room.

After about an hour, Mr and Mrs Espinosa came out of the room. Mrs Espinosa wiped away a tear.

"Come on honey, lets head home." Mr Espinosa said. You could hear his voice was hollow.

"Hi boys. you can go in now, he is awake. And for the love of god if you know why this has happened please tell me." Mrs Espinosa said with sadness in her eyes. We nodded. Taylor looked at me.

"Do you and Nash want to go first?' he asked. I shook my head.

"You and Nash go in. I want to be with Matt alone. If that's okay?" I asked. Taylor nodded. Nash gave me a weird look. Taylor walked in first and closed the door behind him. Nash followed but stopped before the door. He turned around and kissed me. Softly and quickly before heading in the room

It was a while until they came out. You could see that Taylor had been crying again.

"He's all yours." Taylor said while patting me on the shoulder.

"I'm going to head home." Taylor said while walking to the exit.

"Nash bro you want a ride?" he asked. Nash shook his head.

"I'll wait for Cam." he said. Taylor nodded and walked out. Once he was gone Nash looked at me and pulled me in for another kiss. I kissed him back and then pulled away. He nodded his head as if understanding.

I slowly opened the door to Matt's hospital room. It smelt of that strong hospital smell. You know what I'm talking about. It smelt of bandages and medicine. Matt was laying on a hospital bed. There were bandages wrapped around his wrists. He was hooked up to a drip. The room was empty except for a stand that held some food on it, it had not been touched. Matt saw me and sat up.

"Cam.." he said slowly.

Tears started coming out already. I sat on a chair next to the bed.

"Why?" is all I asked. It's all I wanted to know. Matt took a deep breath.

"I have always been... sad I guess. I just never told anyone. I didn't think you guys needed to know. Plus, I was on medication. And it was helping. It's just sometimes things set my emotions off. And I do stupid things." he said while looking down at his wrists.

"I am so sorry..." I said. He looked at me with a perplexed look.

"For what? Cam. You didn't know. You could not have prevented it. It's not your fault." he said sternly.

"I just... I want you to be okay. You're my best friend Matt. I don't know what I would do without you. It kills me that you've been upset and not happy this entire time and I didn't do anything to help it. " I said truthfully. He shrugged.

"It's okay." he said.

Suddenly a nurse barged in the room.

"Visiting hours are over young man." she said. She was scary.

"I haven't even been here for 10 minutes and you're kicking me out?" I asked. She didn't answer me, only stared at me. It was terrifying. I got the message and got up form my seat. I hugged Matt and said I would be back tomorrow. I exited the room to see Nash sitting on a chair, playing on his phone.

"That was quick." he exclaimed.

"Visiting hours are over." I said while rolling my eyes. Nash looked at me. He smiled.

"Come on. Let's get home." he said.

"Can I stay over?" I asked. I needed someone right now. I needed Nash. Nash looked at me and smiled.

"Sure."