Chapter 31: Ever Heard Of The Term 'Anger Sex'?

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"And I'm not trying to stop you love,

If we're gonna do anything we might as well just fuck"- The 1975, Sex

Cameron's POV

 

I have never run so fast in my entire life. My legs still pained but I didn't care. I sprinted out of that room so quickly. I ran out of Taylor's house and rested on the door of my car. There were tears pouring out of my eyes. I heard someone shouting my name.

Someone spun me around, it was Nash.

He looked at me and didn't say anything. I decided to give him a piece of my mind. "Do you just like to do things to hurt me? Because now it seems like you just want to hurt my feelings Nash." I said. He didn't say anything. "After everything I've been through, after everything we've been through. How could you?" I said while shaking my head. The tears were streaming out. "Cameron.." he said slowly. "NO Nash! I'm fucking in love with you and I have been for a fucking long time! STILL after you almost killed me and left me in the cold unconscious, I STILL fucking love you Nash. WHAT does that tell you ? WHAT?" I screamed. Nash flinched. "For the past three months you are ALL I thought about. It's always you Nash and it's always going to be you!" I screamed. Nash had tears in his eyes.

He grabbed my arm and pulled me close to him. Our foreheads were now touching. I was shaking and my breathing was unstable. A tear escaped his eye. He then leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. I didn't know what to do.

I felt a sense of relief. I had missed this. I had missed this so much. Instead of grabbing my waist like he usually does, he grabbed my hand instead and intertwined our fingers while our lips moved in sync. Tears poured out my eyes. In this moment I was so happy. But I hated him for what he did to me, how he treated me and the fact that he was engaged to Lia.

"I hate you." I mumbled in his mouth. He kissed me harder. "I hate you so so much."

He pushed me up against my car and roughly kissed me, causing me to gasp. His hands reached around my back pocket and pulled out my car keys. "Show me how much you hate me." he said while attacking my neck with bites. He then bought his lips back to mine rather harshly. I could feel my lips bruise under his.

He unlocked my car and opened the back seat, not removing his lips from mine. He pushed me in the back and got on top of me, closing the door behind him, enclosing us in the small space. He looked at me and smiled, and then re-attached his lips to mine. His hands played at the waist band of my underwear. I moaned into his mouth. His hands slid down my pants. My heart beat started to increase. Morally, I should not be doing this. But I didn't care. My heart was bursting with joy and pure hatred at the same time.

"I hate you so much Nash." I said while his hands moved around my ass.

"You're going to regret saying that." he said while squeezing my ass.

"Please Nash, make me fucking regret it." I said while moaning in his mouth.

With one movement he pulled off my pants and underwear, throwing them off the car seat.

He buried his head in my neck and started kissing and biting. "I missed you so much Cam." he said through his muffled voice. "So much..." he said while grabbing ahold of my length.

I gulped. I tugged at his shirt. He wasn't naked, I was, well partially. He got the message and slipped off his t-shirt. I did the same to mine. He looked down at me. "God you're so beautiful Cam." he said while leaning in for a kiss. My heart thumped uncontrollably while I mumbled 'i hate you' over and over again.

I tugged at his pants. I tried to unbuckle his belt but it wasn't working. I couldn't concentrate with Nash's tongue all up in my mouth.

He smirked at my failed attempt to get his pants off. He slipped them off himself. I paused for a second I went back to kissing him.

With one sudden movement he turned me around. He pattered kisses all over my back and neck. He then pushed in. I yelled out in pain, partially because I expected him to ease in and stretch me first and not go all out. It's been a while since I last had sex.

The pain was unbearable. I should really have sex more often to avoid horrible situations like this. Especially with Nash. Especially with Nash. God what was I thinking?

He thrusted harder and harder. I continuously yelped out in pain.

"Sorry babe." he said while lifting my head up and kissing me. Babe babe babe? How dare he call me that.

"Don't call me that." I said in-between breaths and moans.

I could feel him stop for a millisecond but then he continued.

He slowed down and eventually it started to feel good. I moaned out in pleasure and Nash let out a stifle laugh. "It's about goddamned time." he said while increasing his speed.

I eventually reached my peak and screamed Nash's name.... really loudly. I forgot that we were in the back seat of my car, outside of Taylor's house. I am three hundred percent sure they heard. And I started to wonder if only Nash had ran out after me. What if someone else did too and saw.... Oh god.

The sound of Nash letting out a loud moan pulled me out of my thoughts, he didn't say anyone's name. He then pulled out, turned me around and laid on top of me. "I missed this." he said. I didn't say anything. I didn't really want to.

I could feel guilt sweep through my body. I should not have done this. He doesn't care about me, he's made that abundantly clear. I just give in to easily when it comes to Nash.

He leaned in and kissed me softly. I didn't respond for a while but I eventually gave in.

Our lips moved like that for a while. Perfectly together and in sync.

"You kind of gave me mixed messages back there, I didn't really know what to do." Nash said while rubbing the back of his head. "Now you know how it feels." I said trying to make the anger in my voice apparent.

Nash didn't say anything and this annoyed me. "What do you want Nash?" I asked while sitting up and looking for my boxers. "Do you want me? Do you want Lia? Because you need to make up your goddamned mind." I said. "Cameron..." he said slowly. "NO Nash. If you want to be with Lia, that's fine, but this will be the last time you see me. The last time we ever do this Nash. This is the LAST time I let you do this to me." I said while pulling on my boxers.

Again, silence. I wasn't going to try again. I opened the car door and got out.

Suddenly I felt myself getting pulled back in the car. "Cameron..." he said for the millionth time. "NO-"

"Cameron god dammit listen to me. I am sorry okay I am so fucking sorry. For everything. I-" he stuttered. "For hurting you..." he said. A tear came out of his eye and he cupped my face with his hand and smiled, I could see his lip trembling. "I am so sorry Cameron... I just..." a stream of tears poured down his face. "I have no excuse for what I did... I just... You are all I want Cameron. You. You are all I've always wanted. I just, I find it difficult to come to terms with things in my own mind and... I'm just so sorry." He said. I didn't know how to feel. I didn't know whether to believe him or not. I didn't know whether he was lying and would just leave me again. "I'm scared Cam. But this. What you and me have. It makes me feel something I've never felt before and." He choked out and wiped his tears. "I just." I didn't let him finish. I made up my mind. I wanted this, I've always wanted this. I grabbed the back of his neck and smashed his lips on mine. I could tell I was crying and so was he. I could taste our tears.

We pulled apart. "Please say something Cam..." he said. "Why are you with Lia?" I asked while looking down. "To please my family. That's all it is. That's all it will ever be Cameron, I don't love her anymore, I did at one point but that's gone ok." He said. I was so overwhelmed with emotion that I grabbed his face and started kissing him again. I didn't know what to say. I couldn't even speak. This didn't feel real.

"Cameron..." and then there was a large knock on the window.

"Nash what the FUCK?" It was Lia.

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