•Benefits• {cash} {boyxboy}

Chapter 25: Hatred

Cameron's POV

It had been a week since I last saw Nash. He had not returned any of my phone calls or texts. I was kind of relived by this. As much as I did want him to respond to me, I was kind of terrified of what his response would be.

What he said to me that night kept repeating itself over and over. The way Nash switched like that. He was from saying 'Love you' to calling me a faggot. I couldn't comprehend it at all.

I had already moved into my new apartment. It was actually quite lovely. It was also large. It had three bedrooms, a living room, dining room, kitchen ect. I don't know why my mom got me such a big apartment. Maybe she was hoping that someone would move in with me. Highly unlikely. The only person I would ever consider letting move in with me probably hates my guts and Matt hasn't been talking to me.

I missed Matt. I really did. I could talk to him whenever I felt down and he could make me feel better immediately. I do however regret not asking him what was wrong. I feel like if I had done that things would be different between us.

And then there was Nash. I missed him, I really did. And I did love him, I just wasn't sure anymore. Not about me, about him. He has told me he loves me so many times but now looking back, I find that hard to believe. Especially after last week, I don't think I'll ever see Nash again, not voluntarily anyways.

I understand though. I understand why he would be upset after his mother walking in. Nash's family was pretty homophobic. Even Nash was... well I don't know where he stands on that to be honest.

I would be pretty upset if my mom had to find out too. I don't think she'd shun me though. She isn't that kind of mother. I sighed. I missed my mom.

I felt empty. Not really upset or angry, just empty. Like a bit of me was gone. For the past week I had tried my best to focus on work. Try to push away the thoughts in the middle of the night. It had worked so far. Well, it worked partially. It was always at the back of my mind. He was like a leach. Consuming my every thought. I couldn't help but wonder what happened to him after I left. Was he okay? Did his parents kick him out?

All these questions buzzed through my head.

I was currently laying on my bed. I really felt like going for a walk. I grabbed my shoes and left my phone on my bed. I exited my apartment and locked the door behind me. Once I had exited the complex block, I arrived on the sidewalk. I started running.

I know I said I that I wanted to for a walk but I thought maybe a run was better.

I had been running for about twenty minutes and I had to stop to get some rest.

Then I saw him. Nash.

He was sitting on a bench in an empty park across the road. My heart started beating really fast. Should I go over there? Every inch of my brain said no but my body started walking towards the park.

I slowly approached the bench. I tapped his shoulder. He spun around and I gasped. He had a black eye and bruises along his arm. I stared at them for a while. I was speechless. I felt tears welling in my eyes. This was my fault.

"Cameron. What are you doing here? Please leave." He said while getting up and walking away after he realized I would not leave. I ran up after him and spun him around. I felt a surge of confidence. "Why do you keep telling me to leave? Don't you realize that I am going nowhere I'm never going anywhere Nash. I'm never going anywhere because I'm in love with you." I said while crossing my arms. My breath shook.

He just looked at me for a while. No emotion whatsoever.

"Then I'll make you leave." He said with a serious voice.

He then did something I did not expect him to do. He hit me.

He did not just hit me, he punched me square in the face. It sent me tumbleling down to the ground. I heard him spit the word 'Faggot ' at me.

He just crossed the line.

"SO that's what you're going to do now hey. Beat up the fag! Why are you such a coward!" I spat while getting up. Another punch. This one was harder and sent me back on the floor.

"Why can't you accept that you're gay Nash. Gay as a fucking rainbow and that you may love me!" I said softly from the ground. It was hard to move and my eye was swelling. I could also taste blood in my mouth. Tears started pouring out of my eyes. I felt a kick to the stomach. I quickly grabbed my stomach and yelled out in pain.

I looked up at him.

The look he had on his face was unlike anything I had ever seen before. Pure hatred. Hatred for me.

My crying got harder as the pain intensified in my body.

"You need to learn to accept yourself. Just because your parents can't doesn't mean that-" I was cut off with a kick to my back that sent an immense amount of pain through my spine.

I looked up at him. He started walking away.

"Do you feel better now. Do you feel better about yourself now?" I shouted through tears. He turned around and looked at me and then started walking in my direction again.

Everything was blurry.

I could see he had come back and was now standing over me. "I still love you." I whispered softly.

And with one more kick from Nash, everything went black.