The Hobbit ~ Tumblr Challenges

Beorn ~ Envy

He watched as you hung off one of the dwarves, laughing hard, tears of happiness in your eyes, clutching to him hard to keep yourself upright, the dwarf laughing with you, almost just as hard, even though it was a joke that he'd made.

His chest tightened and he had to force himself to look away, had to force himself not to observe the way the joy lit you up, the way that you just brightened up in your laughter, reflecting onto others around you.

He couldn't think about how much he wanted that. That was a road he refused to let himself go down.

But it was happening.

You were talking to the same dwarf at dinner that evening, it was a more serious discussion and he could hear the passion hidden in your voice at the task ahead, could hear that you weren't going to listen to any of the other's concerns, despite an injury you'd obtained.

He couldn't think of that wound, of what it had done to him when he'd first seen it, how he'd stood frozen for just a moment too long. He didn't know you, he couldn't, it would be too dangerous.

And yet seeing you with that wound had hurt him more than he could ever say.

Your words to the other dwarf grew more serious, words becoming slightly heated. You didn't want to be taken away from your people, from your family, you wanted to go where they were going.

He wanted to intervene, he didn't, but he wanted to.

The argument continued later that night, your words more desperate, your hand holding the other dwarves tightly. He looked sad, his words pleading, he didn't want you to get hurt anymore than you already were, but you didn't think it was your place to be here, you wanted to be with your people.

He'd offered for you to stay, the words leaving him before he'd thought about them and the consequences, a small bit of satisfaction coming over him when your dwarf agreed.

You were safer here, at least, that was what he told himself, that he could protect you from the forces outside.

Whether he could protect you from himself and what he was, that was a question he didn't want to answer.

There were more tears and frustrations the next the day, begging them all not to go without you, but there was nothing you could do, even as you turned to the dwarf you'd been with, Bofur if he remembered correctly, there was no further convincing them.

You were wounded and it would be best to leave you somewhere safe where you could rest and recover.

A sense of satisfaction filled him as they left you behind, but he quickly buried it as he told you to return to his home, that he would return upon ensuring your friends were safe. He had to ignore his feelings as he shifted, he couldn't let on to his bear form at what had happened.

But his mind was on you as he followed, his bear growing agitated, not helped by the other dwarves, especially the one you'd been with, constantly talking about it, and he found himself too eager to go back.

He kept himself in control as much as he could as he got back, watching you sit outside his home in the sunlight, looking glum, waiting for...something. He refused to let himself think that it was him.

You looked up as he approached, frowning at him. "Why did you tell them I could stay?"

He tilted his head. "Because you need time to recover from your wound. It would not be safe for you to travel, especially in the lands of Mirkwood."

"And the fact that you've been watching me has nothing to do with it?"

The accusation in your tone was clear and he didn't like it. "I've been simply making sure that your wound is healing well. I hardly wished to worry your kin and intended further."

"Intended?" You asked, standing and folding your arms. "I do hope you aren't talking about Bofur?"

He just stared, unsure of how to react to this statement, his stomach knotting.

"No, just no." You said hotly. "He's my brother and you have no right to make decisions for me."

It was like a clamping force suddenly let go of his chest, being able to breathe easier as those words came from your lips; it was like he was releasing a breath that he didn't even know he'd been holding.

"I didn't make the decision," He said calmly. "I simply offered a solution. It is safe here."

Your look at him was unconvinced. "Right, well, I hope you know that as soon as I'm healed, I'm leaving Beorn. I will not be kept from reaching that mountain with my kin."

Beorn holds back a low growl, hiding his uncertainty and discomfort of his feelings, and nods. "I would expect nothing else Y/N, but until then, you are stuck here. I do not wish to be your enemy."

"Right." You said. "Then you better show me something to do so I don't get bored."

He chuckles, ignoring your look and leads you back inside.