The Deathly Scream - 𝟙

༒ Eighty-six ༒

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That evening I decided to come out of my room, wearing nothing but a simple dress. I still didn't feel good. Images of my sister kept playing through my head.

For one moment I honestly had believed I saw my mother, but the reality was even worse. Another part of me was gone and I couldn't understand why my sister would bring herself in danger like that. She had warned me a thousand times for the same thing she had done now.

It was time for me to process everything that had happened. I couldn't stay stuck in my past like my father had done. I didn't want a life like that.

In front of Jade's door I hesitate before knocking, we hadn't spoken in a week. She had lost the love of her life and I hadn't been there to help her. Back then I couldn't even move, I had been to weak. I raise my hand and knock on the door softly. when no one answers I find the force to knock louder.

A tear runs down my face when I think about the pain she must have felt all those days. Losing her soulmate, losing the insurance of a good life. I knock again and open the door without asking, only to walk in a dark room. Barely light because of the sun that was going down. Jade sits on the ground between torn canvasses. Her head between her legs, not moving at all. I close the door behind me, staring at her damaged bedroom. The dark soldiers had been here and all her artworks were ruined.

Jade's shoulders start to shake when I walk closer to her, kneeling down before this broken soul. I softly lay my hand on hers and finally she looks up, barely a glance of the Jade I used to know.

'How long have you been sitting here?' I whisper concerned. Confused she looks around, her gaze staring out of the window when she lifts her shoulders. She didn't know. I sit down next to Jade, laying my arms around her when she starts sobbing again. Only a hoarse sound coming out of her throat. We sat like that for a moment, both our tears running down like a waterfall.

'I'm sorry I wasn't here with you', I whisper after a while, trying to control the sound of my voice. She sits straight up, wiping the tears from her face with her shaking hands. Staring at me for a moment with her intense blue eyes.

'You lost your sister, Rosa', she reminds me. 'You shouldn't apologize'.

'You lost the love of your life', I remind her and she nods, another tear stream running down her face.

'Rosa, you lost family. I lost someone who wasn't even mine'. Her voice turns into a whisper and I can't understand what she is even saying. Levi loved her, I thought they had been together. When she sees my confused expression she laughs soft through her tears, shaking her head a little.

'Levi was too good for me. We never could've start a life. I was brought here to serve in order for safety and he wanted to have a family', she explains. I stare in front of me, letting her confession sink in for a moment.

'Why wouldn't you start a family?' I ask after a while.

'I have my duties. My life is about serving you and I'm good with that'.

'It shouldn't be that way', I remind her.

'Levi understood', she whispers back. I thought both of them had lived in a fairy tale, the perfect relationship. It seemed that I was blind for reality.

'Valentina's funeral is in three days', I change the subject. 'I was thinking about honouring Levi also that day. My father wants me to write a speech'.

'That would be wonderful'. Jade leans against my shoulder and I lay an arm around her, holding her close to me. We both stare at the paintings in front of us, letting the thought of the funeral sink in when I realise I still had to write my whole speech. Elliott had been the one to give me that message. I don't believe I would see my father until the actual day of the funeral.

'What about you and Cameron?' Jade asks after a while, interrupting the silence. I swallow my upcoming nausea away, the tension raising up when I think about him.

'He helped me to clean my wound after the war. After that we haven't seen each other anymore', I admit.

'He hasn't searched for contact?'

'He has but I didn't want to let him in'. Jade sits up to look at me, confusion in her eyes.

'Why not?'

'I guess I am afraid. He was a candidate of my sister', I whisper.

'You already knew that when you went on secret dates with him'. She raises an eyebrow, still sadness all over her face. I didn't know what to tell her.

'Rosa, I lost the man I love. You have a chance to be with Cameron. I can tell he loves you, don't ruin that'. My eyes fill with tears for a moment but I wipe them away quickly. I couldn't talk about this any longer. Instead we decide to clean up her room, throwing away every painting that was torn apart.

We had to find a way to overcome our lost. We should be happy to be alive.