Chapter 44

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       I let out a long sigh. My body has finally calmed down.

That thing is just a natural reaction, it is not in my control, that's why I was acting like that. Am I right? 

I stay quiet, thinking about what has happened just now. The way my body is turned on by his touch bothers me. 

I'm disgusted with him, how the fuck I was being like that? 

I sigh again. 

I heard this kind of thing happens to all the sex victims.. I'm a victim.. 

I nod my head, convincing myself that it's just a natural reaction and I'm his victim. 

I close my eyes. "I'm the victim, I'm the victim" I mutter to myself

I open my eyes again, looking at the boring view of the bathroom.

I'm still in the bathroom. I don't know how long I've been here but it's just so long.

I don't want to go out. It's just so many times that Jungkook is suddenly out there, in front of the door, waiting for me. 

I just need some time to be alone too. 

I am sitting in the toilet bowl now. I throw my head down as my muscles are stiff from sitting here for a while.

What Jungkook has said to me comes flashing in my mind. 

My heart hurts again. 

I swear to God, my grade was terrible not because I was busy dating...

I'm just a fool... Naturally..

And I was dating at an early age because I was so curious about men. 

I was just curious about the feeling to be loved by a man. 

I know this is not really the reason but probably because I didn't grow up with the love of the father that I'm so curious about to be loved by a man. 

And he spat that I was busy chasing the dick too..

I click my tongue.

Maybe because I used to chase his love, so he said that to me! 

I regret it to my death!

I just never expect that someone can be this evil. Just how the damn I could ever think of someone that even the police can't catch him. 

It does not make sense and I just only see it happen in the movie.

But now this bullshit is happening in front of my eyes, and I'm living with him. 

Shit, I don't feel safe.

I just remember how he knows all about me. 

I never tell him about my grades. I started dating him just several months ago and I didn't have a problem with my grade at that time, so I never told him.

But he knew that I have to repeat this one subject for two semesters. I feel just a little bit relief that he didn't say what the subject was. If he did, I will so scared to death.

But still, I have a chill now. Just why does he bother about my grade so much?

Why does he need to know everything about me? 

My eyes widen when another thing comes across my mind. I recall what Taehyung had told me before.

Jungkook never lets go of his people. If they don't stay loyal to him, he'll get rid of them. 

What if what he promises me about those eight months more is just a lie?

What if he actually never ever has intention to free me?

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