Rebirth of Poisoned Empress, by 颜若优雅

Chapter 82

"Lei Zhen, I still can't sleep."

Halfway through the time of Chou (1-3am), Shen Liang who had returned to Zhonglin Courtyard sat by the window, hugging his legs. He tilted his head and peered out at the new moon in the sky. It sounded as though he was murmuring to himself, but at the same time, as though he was supposed to be talking to Lei Zhen, but Lei Zhen's figure was nowhere to be seen. 

"What should come will come. The Duke of Qingping has the Ironclad Guards by his side. Nothing will happen to him."

Lei Zhen was nowhere to be seen, but his voice still echoed crisp and clear against Shen Liang's ears through the night breeze. 

Shen Liang smiled lightly: "He doesn't need me to worry about him. With his martial foundation, it shouldn't pose a problem for him to protect himself. What I'm worried about is..."

What?

Shen Liang couldn't say for sure himself. Usually at around this time, you should be in deep sleep already. But he just couldn't sleep tonight for some reason.

"Say, do you think I should find something else to..."

"Master!" Fine. Lei Zhen truly couldn't endure him anymore. He was afraid Shen Liang would conjure up another strange tour for them to go on in the dead silence of the night on a whim. Who knows? Maybe they'd end up in Wangyue City this time?

"What are you panicking for? I was just wondering if perhaps we should find something for those people in the back courtyard to busy themselves with. This opportunity is rare to come by. I can't sleep anyways. Perhaps I should make them empathize," being interrupted, not only was Shen Liang not mad, but he also revealed a silly smile.

"...You speak. I'll go do it," in the next second, Lei Zhen's slender figure materialized outside the window as his tiger eyes locked on Shen Liang deeply like a torch. "However, you must head to sleep immediately afterwards."

It was almost the time of Kuai (3-5am) now. If Yuan Shao and the others were made aware of how careless he was with the Master's health and body, it was highly suspected that he'd be sent back to training.

"Lei Zhen, have you ever liked someone?" the conversation between the two of them were similar to a cow trying to converse with a horse. 

When Lei Zhen heard him, his brows furrowed: "No."

As a candidate for the future Commander and Head of the Nether Guards, there were many things he had to learn and excel in since he started to be sensible. Where would he derive the time to think about romance?

"Truly?" hearing this, Shen Liang leaned his head against his arms: "It's nothing. It has its own silver linings. At least you won't be harmed and won't harm others. In the past, there used to be a fool who thought he understood what it meant to love. He loved with all his heart for just a little warmth. But in the end, he discovered that even that couldn't be considered warmth. He buried and saw off his Ge Ge, the only friends who had ever cared for him, and even his entire maiden family for that. In the end, even he himself died with ruined reputation. I suspect he didn't even leave himself a whole body to be left out in the wild to degrade and picked by the wild animals? Lei Zhen, say, do you think he's a fool as well? It's hard to find a three-legged toad in this world but how much harder would it fare to find a good man on two legs? Why did he have to foolishly hang himself dead on that one tree? Love? Haha... what a clean word. But if it was dyed and stained with blood, how clean could it still remain?"

Shen Liang wasn't sure whether it was the torment of the sleepless night, his incapacity to relax his mind, or perhaps it was because his listener was Lei Zhen, one among the man who died for him in the end, but Shen Liang's story seemed to be mocking himself. He carried a smile on his face, but his expression was desolate and bleak. There were no tears though. Shen Liang found himself unable to spare another tear for his previous self. A fool was a fool. He wasn't worthy of sympathy, not even from himself.