Confession: 3

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Multi-Part Chapter: Part 3 (Last Part)

"What is it then?" John asked.

"Well", Sherlock gripped his armchair, bracing for impact from the conversation they were about to have, "I've been meaning to talk to you about something for a while now".

John inhaled, he suspected the way that this conversation would go, and he was glad that Sherlock was broaching the subject that had been the cause of anxiety for the both of them.

"I'm all yours" John chuckled.

Sherlock flinched, the words that he heard weren't said in the way he wanted to hear them.

"Sorry, wrong choice of words" John said, rubbing his palms together, "I'm listening".

"Well", Sherlock took a deep breath, trying to slow down his breathing that had sped up to an unhealthy rate, "It's...um...".

An awkward pause enveloped the room, the traffic from the outside main street barely getting in through the wallpaper covered walls. Time seemed to stand still.

"You can say it, Sherlock. You can tell me anything. Anything at all, we're best mates... or you know... whatever we are. Anything at all, Sherlock" John stammered awkwardly, breaking the uneasy silence in the flat.

"I'm not used to this. I'm usually so open about everything, I can say what's on my mind all the time and not have to filter myself. And now, now that it's actually important to say what's on my mind, I'm having so much trouble. I've thought so many times about how this conversation would go, I've considered all the outcomes, but I never accounted for not being able to say what I wanted to say" Sherlock muttered out quickly, looking at John's calm face.

"Sherlock. Really, it's okay. I can understand anything. Here, I can help a little maybe" John stood up and walked into the kitchen, looking for some clear glasses. He found some after checking in a couple of cabinets and poured some whiskey into them.

"Here" John outstretched his hand (that was a bit shaky) to Sherlock, and pushed his armchair a little bit closer to his flatmate.

"Thanks" Sherlock said dryly, the alcohol was starting to penetrate into his system, "That's really...um... nice of you. It'll help, I think".

Sherlock took another shaky sip, letting the warm sensation of the Black Label whiskey overtake him. He got braver by every sip he took.

"Okay..." he put down the glass on the floor next to his armchair, "It's now or never".

"John" Sherlock scooted forward so he was sitting at the edge of his chair and faced his flatmate, "Here we go".

"John" he said again, "When we met, I knew you would be an interesting man. A man unlike any other that I have ever met. Your past had been traumatizing and I knew that from the first couple of seconds that we had talked. We grew to become fast friends and soon became near inseparable. I guess it's no surprise everyone thought we were together. I became so fond of you, I grew so accustomed to having you around. It grew into something more than friendship though, but I didn't understand that because I hadn't experienced something like that previously in my life. The aches of the evening that you would spend with Mary instead of me, the pain of not having you around as much as I did before, caught up with me. I understood that I got jealous, and that's when I realized that you and I were truly something more than friends. (Sherlock took a deep breath). I was so happy when you came back to live at Baker Street, I was so happy that I got to spend more time with you. However, with more time spent with you, the deeper my feelings became. I didn't know if you had felt the same, but the little gestures told me that you did. The little brushes of our hands at crime scenes, the lingering of your fingers on mine when you handed me a cup of tea, the proximity of our thighs when we would sit together on the couch, and plenty other times. I've kept a record of all of them, I never delete anything about you".

"John" he continued, "By this long speech, by this long evening and by this long friendship, I am trying to tell you a short message".

Sherlock wrung his hands.

"John" he inhaled, "I love you".

Sherlock closed his eyes, finally letting the words he'd been holding in, slip out. He felt a wave of tiredness wash over him, from the weight being lifted off his shoulders.

"Sherlock" John placed a hand on Sherlock's knee, "I'm so proud of you, I know that took a lot of courage to say".

Sherlock looked up at John, his eyes full of hope, and John smiled back at him.

"I love you, too, Sherlock" he said, tears brimming his eyes.

[I <3 HEARING FROM YOU]
So, here we have it. The i love you's. The confession. What did you think? I tried my best to keep it in character haha.

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