Same But Different - GirlxGirl (Completed)

Chapter Sixty Four

Louisa POV

"It's discharge day!" Dad cheered. I looked around the hospital room, it had been a week since I was stuck in the hospital. Well, technically two years but still one week since I've woken up from the coma. I stared at my dad whose eyes shine as he smiles. I must have hurt him a lot, I thought.

Although I had many reasons for what I did, I think I had many reasons to stay. I had jumped into conclusions, and maybe sadness got the best of me. I could have shared my feelings with dad, he wouldn't have ever pushed me away.

"Dad . . " I spoke.

"No, I know you're going to apologize again and I don't want you to. It's not your fault. I'm sorry you were hurting honey. Just, never again. Don't put me through that again. There are better days to come. Who knows. Have a little faith" He smiles while patting my back.

It was time to get up from this bed. It was time for a fresh start. And in order to do that, I needed to finish chapter one of my life. That is why, I invited the reporters over today and told them how I am given a second chance at life and how I made a mistake by wanting to end my life and leaving my wonderful father behind. It was all true even if a part of me wondered what would have happened if I really did die. Would the emptiness have vanished? Would the world have been a better place? Would my dad have eventually moved on? I was unsure.

Was I disappointed I wasn't dead? No.

I was glad I was alive. Being alive made me realize why it was such a bad idea to end my life. Everyone kept saying 'it'll get better' and I never listened. What if it really got better? Ending my life would have been for nothing!

I was proud at my dad for keeping his faith all this time and never giving up on me. Another reason why, I'm assured that even if no one cared, it doesn't matter. One person can have a huge impact on how you view things in life. My dad was there for me always, through thick and thin. And I'm not going to ruin his life by ending mine. I may have 13 reasons why I wanted to end my life, but he is one reason to stay and fight. And one reason is more than enough.

- - - - - - -

The car ride home took forever. I laid back in my seat and watched the outside world filled with beautiful colors. I never took time to watch the birds fly or admire how green are the tree leaves and I wondered why.

"It's a beautiful day" I murmured.

"It sure is, my princess is finally coming home" Dad sang the words. He was happy and relieved, I could tell.

The car parked in front of the house. A big house, my house and even though there were no fences in mine, I somehow imagined there was. Little flashes appear in my head of a complete different place. Some place I must have dreamt a long time ago.

"Are you okay? Do you need a second?" Dad asked taking off his seatbelt

"Yeah yeah I'm fine" I gave him a side smile. This was the house I grew up in, I was a happy kid overall but somewhere along the lines, I just felt like the weak timid and helpless girl. I got out of the car and made my way inside the house. It was the same but spotless clean.

"Yeah, I had maid service for the past week trying to clean this place since I spent most of my time at the hospital" Dad giggled.

I took a few steps upstairs to my room but I kept seeing yellow sticky notes on each of the steps. Little notes. Like Deja Vu. There weren't there and I was imagining them.

Dad stopped me from walking further.

"I think you should sleep in the guest room. I've even moved your stuff to that room and it .. it doesn't have a balcony"

"Dad, it's okay. I'll be fine. I'll be okay"

As I entered the room, it was empty. I stared at the empty room that made me feel so empty two years ago. The lavender paint didn't look lively enough. The wooden floor creaked as I stepped in. I didn't have much memories in his room, except for my childhood. The only memories I hold dear was my mom's. How she used to sing me lullabies every night. The beige curtains flew freely as I noticed the door of the balcony was wide open. I walked closer with each step recalling the night I decided to end my life.

At the final step, I looked up at the blue beautiful sky remembering how I had asked to show me a sign that it gets better. The breeze hits my face and my tears are warm as they fall down. I close my eyes only to remember more. My prayer that night was answered and I just didn't remember. I take a deep breath and my memories flood back in.

"God, if you're out there and by some miracle you can hear me, show me a sign." I whispered under my breath. "Show me any sign, that it gets better. Show me that I'm wrong for wanting to end my life. Show me that there will be happy days"

I remember them being my last words as Louisa. But there was more that happened after that.

"I can't do this. I can't do this without you Yuri".

"I'm right here next to you, I'm not going anywhere"

"Yuri" I opened my eyes only to realize I was shaking. My eyes teared as I turned my back to the balcony. I was turning my back to my past. After all this time, I had found my answer. I was living it. I ran outside my room to find a very worried dad.

"Dad, I'm okay but I need you to drive me somewhere very quick and it is going to be a very long ride" I yelled as I made my way outside.

"Drive you? Where?" He asked.

"You wouldn't believe me even if I told you. But there is someone I have to meet" It was finally time she met Yuri. It wasn't all a dream. It really happened. My heart yearned for Yuri.

"But you just got home .."

"Dad, this can't wait" I yelled again but I was happy and excited.

"Alright alright. Let's go"

- - - -

During the car ride, dad asked me many questions. Questions I was unable to answer because I knew he wouldn't believe me.

"Okay at least tell me if we are going to go kill someone? Is it one of your bullies?"

"No, we are going to meet a girl"

"A girl? But you just got out of the hospital" That reminded me, Yuri did come to visit me at the hospital. She figured it out. She knows who I am. The thought made me happy and terrified at the same time. If she found me, that meant she knows I tried to suicide.

"Dad, she is the girl of my dreams" I muttered under my breath happily.

When we finally arrived, I didn't hesitate to open the door and run to her doorstep. As I rang the bell, I wondered what I would say to her. Would I refer to myself was Lou or Sasha? Would she still love me even after learning so much about me?

"Yes, may I help you?" Mrs. Williams opened the door. I looked at her happily as she didn't mistake me for her daughter.

"Hi, I'm looking for Yuri. Is she home?" I asked.

"You're . . are you?" She stuttered as I quickly nodded. "Oh my! Yuri told me what happened. You are a gorgeous looking girl."

Mrs. Williams knows who I am. She knows that I am Sasha. "Thank you" I replied feeling shy.

"Yuri's upstairs" Mrs.Willaims nudged.

I looked at dad. "Dad, I'll just be a minute." Or more. Or forever.

I just needed to see her. I ran upstairs, my heart pounding, almost beating out of my chest. I knocked first and then opened the door to her room. And time slowed down as I stared at the most beautiful girl my eyes has ever laid on. She took a few seconds to look at me. I smiled when realization hit her. She dropped her phone on the floor and bit her lip probably to stop herself from crying out loud.

I waste no time as I approach her only to take her in my arms and finally kiss her soft lips.

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