LGBTQIAP+ Milestones: Book 4

Fear of Being Branded a 'Special Snowflake'

By PanCake-Poetry

~

I had been questioning my gender for a lot longer than I had been my orientation. But the orientation was a lot easier for me to figure out, so I came out of the closet about that first. Almost half a year later, I have found the label with which I find most fitting: Bigender. Most bigender people (of whom I know) switch back and forth between the two genders of which their identity is comprised. I, however, identify as boy and girl simultaneously. Anyway, I was a little worried about coming out as bigender. I still am, TBH. What if people think I'm just trying to be a "special snowflake" by being pan-ace AND non-binary? For this reason, I am closeted to most people. I did come out to my closest friend, who was really helpful by not only being accepting, but also by agreeing to test out pronouns and names, etc., with me to see what worked with me. She also gave me the pep talk that gave me the courage to come out to my significant other. He was probably the person about whom I was most worried, since he identifies as genderfluid and I didn't want to seem like I was trying to one-up him or something. See, I found out he was genderfluid at the time I was thinking I was genderfluid. Oof, I can only imagine my face... I hope I didn't look disgusted or unsupportive at first because I definitely am! It's just I have this intense insecurity of people thinking I am...unoriginal, I guess you can say. But once I told my amazing S.O. and he fully supported me, I was so relieved and grateful. Well, I was also a little peeved... Like, "I had been dying a little every day while I worked up the courage to tell you this, and you just say, 'Okay'?!" xD But yeah, he is awesome and I love him so much.