Malcolm had called me earlier. He said he needed to talk so I said okay. The only thing is it wasn't his normal voice. I was nervous for this talk he wanted to have. I was just sat waiting for him to come.
"Toulouse baby" I smiles tapping next to me in which he jumps on my bed and cuddles next to me. "Hi baby" I smile downs to him patting him as my other dogs come and join the fuss.
That was when I saw him. "Hey" I smile. He had a key to my house since we had been dating nearly two years and been friends for so long.
"Hey" he smiles sitting down next to me. I make all the dogs get off the bed and sit up. He leans over to me and kisses my lips like it was going to be the last.
"I've been thinking" he says "about what" I ask "I can't be in a relationship with you anymore" he says looking in to my eyes at they fill up with tears "w-what you mean" I sniff. "I don't want to break you. I'm hurting Ariana and I want to heal. I want to be the best I can be, but I can't do that with you" he pushes a strand of hair behind my ear.
"What you saying I bring you down. I thought you loved me" I sob my "I do love you Ariana more than you would know. I'm doing this to protect you. I want you to succeed in life. I want you to be brave and release sweetener and go on tour. But I want you to do all that with out me." He sobs with me.
"I don't think I can Malcolm. I'm afraid to be alone. I still have nightmares. I love you" I wipe my eyes "I'm sorry Ariana I have to do this. I love you" he kisses my forehead placing the key to my house on the side and leaving the house leaving me to curl up on my bed and cry.
I grab my phone and call my mom asking her if she could come round. I was a heartbroken girl who just watched the love of their walk away.
I just wish him the best and hope that this helps him with his recovery. I was selfish before I couldn't help it. I didn't want to be. I know he's been struggling and I know this is probably for the best.
"Hey sweetheart" my mum comes into the room and sits next to me rubbing my back soothingly. "What happened sweetheart" she asks "he broke up with Me" I sniff "sweetheart I know this is hard for you but you both have been struggling to keep this relationship together. You argued all the time and no matter how much you love each other and made up that was hard for you both especially what has happened during your relationship" she kisses my head. "I know Mum but I loved him" I sniff looking up to her trying to stop my self from crying.
"I know you did sweetheart but you have to let him heal. You need to heal maybe this is what needs to happen. Come on let's get you up and a nice drink" she smiles helping me up.
We both go downstairs "I'm in New York soon" I say "you are sweetie you are and I'm coming with you" she says "you don't have to Mum I'll be okay" I slightly giggle but it didn't last long as I make a drink and see the ring that he gave me.
"I am coming sweetheart." Joan says handing me the mail and a cup of tea. "While you have that and look through the mail I'm going to run you a nice bath" she smiles kissing my head. I give her a soft smile looking through the mail and noticing an invite to the Saturday night live after party.
I was a little shocked for the invite but hey got nothing better to do and I'll be in New York anyway. I look down to my hand slowly take the ring I hadn't taken off since Malcolm gave it to me. I place it on the side and sigh.
It wouldn't be that long before it came out in the public was all I go think about drinking my tea changing his name in my contacts from "my beautiful boy" to "Malcolm McCormick"
"Sweetheart this will get easier I promise. I know he really meant the world to you and you meant the world to him but in a few months or in a year you'll be friends and you'll be happy for each other. You want him to heal and recover and this may be helping him and that's the strongest thing you can do" she tells me taking my hand and looking at me and I nod.
"Maybe when it's sunk in I'll feel a little better. I guess it's going to feel wired having a bed to my self and no cuddles but I'll have to get used to it" I stand up and place my cup by the sink.
"The Bath is ready sweetheart, I'll change your bed sheets and bring you some clean clothes for you" she smiles and I nods heading up to the bathroom and making sure I had a towel before undressing and climbing into the bath that my mum had made perfect for me.
The water was the right temperature and she used my favourite bath bomb causing the most beautiful couloirs and textures in the water.
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I smile to my mum as she comes in. "Do you actually have any clean clothes" she asks "not really" I mumble ashamed of my self. "I live in oversized tops Mum I just forget to wash clothes but I guess I'll have too" I say "no need your mums her and while you relax I'm going to clean your clothes since I don't want my daughter doing stuff that she doesn't want to do while she's sad" she kisses my head making me smile. She was literally the best mum ever.
Me and Frankie were lucky to have her as a mum. We were all a close family so I guess everything is okay. Since I only had a shower this morning I didn't need to wash my hair so I just sat and relaxed for about 20 minutes before getting out and wrapping a towel around my body cleaning my face and putting my skin care routine on it to try and stop my face from burning from all the crying I had done before I dried myself off and got changed into my shorts and top that my mum had bought me.
I walk down to my laundry room and lean against the door frame. "Can I go and have a sleep" I ask "of course you can Ariana. It will help you feel better. I'll be here when you wake up. If not I'll make sure I lock the door after me and make sure the dogs are okay" she smiles and I nod kissing her cheek before walking up to my bed and crawling into the sheets and falling asleep into a nap.
