𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐰𝐞 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬

im here ~ jonah

i've never written anything this personal before

Your best friend and roommate had just stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door behind her. "Ugh!" You groaned before letting yourself fall back onto the couch. You shut your eyes tightly and rubbed your hands over your face. The sound of the door opening again made you drop your hands back to your sides. You prepared yourself for another fight, "hey, what's she so mad about?" You were surprised to hear Jonah's voice instead of y/b/f/n. "Nothing, her boyfriend is probably being a jerk." You huffed, trying to play off the fact that you felt both like crying and screaming. Jonah took off his shoes and stepped farther into your home. "Are you sure? You seem pretty tense too." He asked, walking to the fridge to grab a bottle of water. "Mhm." You responded. You pulled yourself up onto the island in the middle of the kitchen and began to pick at the strings of your friendship bracelet. Jonah put his water down after taking a sip. "You sure you're ok y/n?" You told him you were fine again but your watery eyes told him otherwise. His face filled with concern. "Y/n, babe, you can tell me what's wrong." You shook your head. "No it's ok, I'm ok." Your tone was very unconvincing. "You clearly aren't, tell me, maybe I can help." Jonah's tone was full of care. "It doesn't matter Jo, I'll be fine." He stepped back. "Why can't you tell me?" You let out a breath, "Jonah, it really doesn't matter." He crossed his arms over his chest. "Well obviously it does, I don't like to come over to your house to find your best friend stomping out and you in tears. Just tell me what's wrong, I want to be able to help." You got off the counter and walked back to the living room. "Jonah, my problems have nothing on everybody else's ok? I don't need to concern and burden you with my petty little issues, so just drop it ok?" You said, all the pent up energy spilling out of you and into your tone. His face dropped, as did his arms. "You really feel that way?" He asked, voice hushed. You looked at him bashfully. "Well, yeah." Your voice quivered. "Oh my gosh, why?" He asked as he came closer to you. "Because it's true, you get stressed over touring and obsessive amounts of work, which is reasonable, y/b/f/n is going through stuff with her parents, my sister has the whole bullying thing going on at her high school, my problems just seem so insignificant." Jonah didn't say anything, he just hugged you. "I never want you to feel like that. Ever. If anything is wrong I want you to tell me, we can get through it together, or I can just be there for moral support." You smiled at his words, "thanks Jo." He pulled back and rubbed his hands up and down your arms. "So, are you gonna tell me now? I mean, if you really don't to that's ok." You nodded. "We just got into this huge fight and I guess she got tired of me being right and telling her the truth. So she left. Probably to Connor's house." You explained. "Mhmm, your gonna have to fill me in." The two of you moved to the couch. "Well, she's been out a lot more lately, going to parties, drinking, staying out for a couple of days without even telling me where she is or where she's going." "Also, the other day, she skipped her two hour lecture, which is needed for her to graduate by the way, to hangout with her boyfriend." Jonah's eyes remained fixated on you. "She's been changing so much lately, and I know people are allowed to change and that change can be good, but she isn't improving, she's turning into someone she really isn't." He noticed how you had gone from tense and angry at your friend to sad and vulnerable. "It's had such an emotional toll on me." You said quietly, fiddling with the ends of your sleeves. "I've noticed, you've seemed a lot more down recently." Jonah said. You nodded. "I've come to the realization that she's, um toxic, you know, to me." You let your hands fall. "Jonah, how the hell am I supposed to tell my best friend she's toxic and hurting me? How am I supposed to tell her I don't like the person she is becoming?" You whimpered. He pulled you into him and stroked your hair. "It's hard baby, I know." "It's so hard, Jo." Your voice was muffled but the fabric of his shirt. "I've known her since I was eleven. She moved out to L.A with me, every memory I have, she's there, she's always been there for me. And now?" "The worst part was that she thought everything was fine before we fought. She never noticed how down I had become. She never even asked if I was ok. Is that selfish of me? To have wanted her to notice?" You started to cry. Jonah shook his head. "Of course not." "How can I just move on without her?" Jonah swept a few strands of hair from your face. "It's gonna be hard love, but you can't let yourself become someone you don't like. You just might have to let go." He kissed your forehead. "It won't be easy, but you'll always have me. And the guys too." You moved out of his grasp and wrapped your arms around yourself. You looked him in the eye. "It's so hard watching my best friend slip away from me and become someone I never would have made friends with in the first place." Your voice cracked. "I know baby, I'm so sorry." He said genuinely, kissing your tears away. "I am always here for you y/n, I'm always here for you to talk to, you know that right?" Your lips turned up into a sad smile, "yeah, I know." Jonah held your face gently in his hands and kissed you. "No matter what babygirl, I'll always be here for you." You ran a hand through his messy hair. "Thank you Jo."
____________________________________________
hihi party people! sorry for all the eMoTiOnAl updates this week but it's been a rough couple of weeks for me and i felt as though i had no one to talk to about anything so writing just kind of became my outlet. but, i want all y'all to know that if you ever feel like you have no one to talk to, seriously just pm me. i'm on this app wayyy to much and i will respond. not having anyone to vent to suckkss and i want to make sure you don't feel alone like i did. nobody deserves that. i love y'all :)