Senseless Abyss (Zero-One Fanfic)

-Chapter 125

-Chapter 125: I Don't Understand It

I don't understand it. How did I marry someone like Gai and why? There is no way that I fell in love with him. Someone like him is untouchable and snake like. He shouldn't have an interest in me if he can find almost any girl in the world to be his. His wealth is enough to get a girl's attention.

"Did it jog your memory yet?" Aruto asks me curiously and I look over at him as he approaches me with two mugs. "I made hot chocolate. I know you love hot chocolate, so I decided to give you some."

"Most women love chocolate." I look back at the TV and shake my head. "No, I don't remember anything about Gai at all. He seems too great for me and it is odd. I don't get how we got together."

"It isn't my place to tell you all about your marriage, but I feel like someone needs to give you something. You didn't marry Gai because you loved him. It wasn't a marriage full of love."

"I married him for what reason then?" If I didn't love him, there had to be some other reason I married him. 

Aruto places down the mug and smiles. "It isn't important right now. We should take things slow and ease you back into your daily routine. It has been nice seeing what kind of person you were before we met, but I kind of want to have you look at me how you used to." And how was that look?

"I gave you a look of sorts?" What kind of look would that be?

I don't know how Aruto fits into things. He seems like the kind of guy who lets people have a taste first and then he gets into it when he can no longer wait. Of course, that is supposed to be about women. He sees a sexy woman and he can't approach her unless he has to approach her by someone forcing his hand.

"You did." He pops down next to me. "We were close to each other."

"Close?" So, we were friends then and nothing more? What a shame. "I see. That is a shame honestly."

"Why do you say that?" he asks me, sounding curious.

"Because we were close friends before, right?"

"We're definitely close friends," he answers, nodding his head. "Very, very close friends." I am not following this. What is that supposed to mean? 

"Horobi...I remembered kissing him."

"Oh, he kissed you," Aruto states and he looks away, looking a bit unhappy about that. Does he dislike Horobi? "Your husband knew about it. You were never with Horobi romantically as far as I know, but you two were somewhat together. It wasn't dating. There are many reasons why you never pursued him."

"I don't love him then?" So, does this mean I'm not a whore? Not that there is anything wrong with wanting to get with many guys, but I don't wish to be that way.

Aruto looks back at me as I reach over, grabbing my mug. "You loved Horobi, but you two weren't in a romantic relationship. Horobi isn't the kind of person who loves, Mari. He...he is difficult to explain you without more context." Why can't he give me more context? 

"Ah, so he has no interest in me then?" I guess I'm not as appealing with this face as I was with my old one. "Am I unappealing to him?"

"I wouldn't say that you don't appeal to him."

I put down my mug and move closer to Aruto, looking him in the eyes. If I'm truly attractive, he'll be into me, right? This face has to appeal to someone since it isn't remotely ugly. It isn't as sexy as my previous face, but it is a sexy face.

"W-What are you doing, M-Mari?" Aruto asks, moving back a bit as his face turns a bit redder.

"I wanted to see if I was appealing to someone here. My ex-husband doesn't seem to really care for this face and my husband doesn't seem that attached to me. Then, Aruto, you told me that Horobi isn't that invested in me. So, is there no one that is into me?" I'm not ugly, so I can't be unappealing. Not to toot my own horn, but there is nothing really wrong with this face.