Legacy (Book 5)

By Your Side

|Jamie's POV|

I entered the house to hear music playing. Entering the living room I saw Brandon dancing around with Bianca. He was singing to her as she laughed. I secretly recorded him as they were in their own little world. I went over to the music, turning it down, making my presence known. Brandon smiled once he noticed me.

"Hey, baby."

"Hey," I softly replied.

He gave me a concerned look before making his way towards me. He placed a kiss on my forehead, handing Bianca to me. I held her close to my chest. She moved her face to mine, planting a gummy kiss. That was her new thing, damn near chewing off our faces. I mimicked what she did as she laughed.

"Everything okay?" Brandon asked.

"I uh, just had a tough therapy session."

He slowly nodded.

"Want to talk about it?"

"Not really, but I can't keep this from you anymore."

"Do you want to go lay down while I put Bianca down for her nap?"

"Is it okay if I put her down? I just want to hug her right now."

"Of course. You don't need to ask me to do that, J. I'll be down here."

He gave me another kiss as I went up to Bianca's room. I then realized I forgot her bottle, but here comes Brandon to the rescue once again.

"Here you go," he softly said.

I took it from him as he placed a kiss on Bianca's cheeks before leaving the room. I held Bianca close to my chest, watching her hold her bottle. It's crazy to think that in just a few months we would have a 1 year old. So much has happened this past year and I'd do everything in my power to be the best mom I could for her.

"Mommy is going to get better and heal, baby. I promise. You deserve the best of me. So does daddy," I whispered.

Once she was finished, I burped her and she was out like a light. One thing about Bianca, she was going to get her sleep in. Grabbing the monitor, I headed downstairs to see Brandon was sitting in the living room. I went and sat next to him, laying my head on his shoulder. As he wrapped his arm around me, I felt my chest start to tighten. The tears were building. I was trying to hold it in. I know Brandon felt me tense as he tightened his grip.

"I'm right here, baby. I'm right here," he whispered.

I couldn't hold the tears in anymore. Here I was crying, for the third time today. Does it get any better? Is this healing process nothing but tears? He held me close to him as I cried, not saying anything. He just kept rubbing my back. After I felt I was all cried out, literally, I was tired. Sometimes this was all too much.

"Brandon..."

"Yes, baby."

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what, J?"

"I just feel like I'm depriving you of the wife that you want and deserve."

"What?"

"I know you want marriage. I'm just scared."

"Scared of what?"

"I know I told you a little bit about my parents, but there's a lot that I haven't told you. A lot that is coming up in therapy. Today my therapist told me I'm afraid of commitment. I thought that was impossible. We've been together for 7 years. We just started our family. Still, I'm afraid of the next step after seeing what I saw growing up."