The Bottom Namjoon Collection!

Break me (Part 9 out of 11)

It didn't take long for Jungkook to realise that what had happened was wrong and messed up. It didn't take him long to realise that the words coming out of his mouth were wrong, that he was letting his own anger get the best of him as he so often did.

He wanted to follow Namjoon, wanted to stop him, wanted to force both of them to sit down and calm down, to actually talk about it, using their brains instead of their hurt and injured hearts.

The world was not that kind to him. In his hurry to get to Namjoon, following the man who seemingly took Jungkook's heart with him as he left, his own body failed him, his thigh cramping up from the sleep and the sex they had just had.

The second he took a step to chase down the man who had just run away, he fell, a choked yell of "Namjoon" being all he could manage to try and get the other man to come back.

Nothing.

Just the sound of bare feet hitting the ground as Namjoon made his way through the house, Jungkook unable to follow him, and then... silence.

"Fuck!" Jungkook hit the soft mattress beneath him as he desperately tried to stretch out his leg and get his thigh to stop being a fucking cunt.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

There was no way that Namjoon would actually leave, was there? He was just going to his room.

He knew that wasn't the case, but it didn't stop Jungkook from desperately hoping.

How had it all gone so wrong so quickly?

When he had fallen asleep everything had been perfect, but now everything had shattered.

It was only then, when Namjoon was no longer there, when the place where the older man had been sleeping was getting cold, that Jungkook realised exactly how much that man had started to mean to him. It was no longer just a fascination. Namjoon meant something, Namjoon was important.

So many small moments with him, watching him write in his notebooks, wrapped up in a sweater that Jungkook got for him, talking eagerly about the dog they were watching a documentary about.

Jungkook's 'job' was stressful, and before Namjoon, he was always in a horrible mood when he came home, stressed and only able to think about what was going to happen the next day. Namjoon made him relax, made him able to breathe in a way that nobody else could.

It wasn't just that he was pretty, because he was devastatingly gorgeous, but it was everything else about him: the way he looked at Jungkook, the way he spoke, who he was as a person.

Namjoon made him more human, made him feel that there was more to him than just what he had been raised to be, and now he was gone.

Jungkook had scared him away.

In the end, he had been too much for Namjoon, just as he had always known he would be.

He hadn't handled it well, he knew he hadn't, but his anger and rage had always been his biggest enemy, boiling strong and uncontrollable when he least wanted it, just as they had during his argument with Namjoon.

Now Namjoon had run away, and Jungkook had no idea what to do or how to find him again. How was he meant to fix this when he had no idea where Namjoon even was?

Then again, Jungkook had found him before; he was sure he could do it again.

He relaxed onto the bed, trying to decide how to make sure that Namjoon would actually listen to him the next time they met. He had this strange idea that throwing his money around, which worked with most other people, would not have the desired effect with Namjoon.