One Sister, Seven Brothers, and More Memories {BTS}

I Understand Now

debrahproductions requested this imagine quite a long time ago. I am so so so sorry that I only noticed your request like last week or so. I hope this is good enough to make it up to you~! Enjoy~

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"So think about it," your teacher lectured at the front of the classroom. All your classmates had fallen quiet and were far too bored to even pass a note around, leaving each and every one of you to listen to the painful lesson. "What would you do if your parents died? Where would you go?"

You felt a few eyes glance your way and you looked at your teacher in hopes that she would change this dreadful lecture to a happier one instead. She was a new teacher and she had no clue about your past and you wanted so desperately to keep it that way.

"Well, some of you would go to your grandparents, maybe to a close relative, or you might just be stuck in an adoption place, hm?"

You sat down your pencil and crossed your arms.

"I know none of you have ever gone through that, right?" she asked, looking around the class with bright eyes.

"No," everyone subconsciously spoke.

"Alright," she continued. "But there's a lot of things that can be affected when one's parents die. For instance, they could become problematic children right?"

A few people shook their heads. But your mind began to wander away, like always. The teacher began to speak about the emotional problems that a parent's death could cause.

"If my parents died," a classmate said, "I don't know what I would do. My mom always does my hair in the mornings and my dad brings me my lunch every day. I don't think I could survive without them."

I don't have parents to do that for me. I have my brothers, though, so it's okay.

"My mom always speaks for me when I go to order because she knows how awkward I am," another one mentioned. "And my dad cooks every night for my family."

I wonder what it would be like for Eomma and Appa to still be here with us. Would they do things like this?

"I don't have a mom," another classmate spoke up, "but my dad does everything he can to help me out when I need it, even when he's swamped with work."

And then the gears in your mind started working. What if your parents were still alive? What would you and your siblings be doing? Would you be a happier family? What was it like when they were around before? You looked at the door, feeling the tears build up in your eyes. I don't have anybody to these things for me. I don't know what a mother's or father's love feels like. And I won't ever know.

"Kim (Y/N), are you okay?" your teacher asked, drawing you out of your trance.

"N-N-No..." You stood up and walked up to her podium. "M-M-May I go call my brother?"

"What for?"

You felt the world stop around you. You heard your best friend suck in a breath, knowing how sensitive you were to this kind of topic. "My uh, my parents died when I was six."

Your teacher's face went white. "I am so sorry, Miss (Y/N). I... I didn't know."

You shook your head. "It's okay. I just need to talk to my brother."

"Go right ahead," your teacher sympathized.

And you bolted. You took off to your locker and swung open the metal door, tears making your face wet. You fished through your backpack and found your phone at the bottom and you gripped it before rushing to the bathroom. You threw the door open and went to the last stall, dialing a sibling's number. As soon as the stall door shut, your brother answered the phone and you burst.

"I understand, Namjoon-oppa," you cried.

"What?" he asked over the phone. "Why aren't you in class? Is something wrong?"

"In health class we've been talking about phsychology and stuff dealing with emotions and today we were just talking about what a parent's death can cause someone," you sobbed.

"And?"

"Namjoon I miss them and I don't even remember what they were like." You blew your nose as you sat on the toilet. "I just couldn't handle it and I just thought about how I don't even know what they were like. I don't even remember what they look like. All I imagine them as is what my mind pictures after looking at the frames in the hall way."

"It'll be okay," Namjoon soothed, for he knew who were mentioning. "It's alright."

"No it's not," you continued.

"Yes, it is," Namjoon countered. "Just calm down, kiddo. You'll be okay."

"I just feel like an outcast or something because I don't know my parents at all," you said.

"I understand," Namjoon cooed. "But you'll be okay. I'll pick you up from school today, okay? And then we can go get some ice cream or something."

You nodded, though he wouldn't be able to see it. "Yeah, thanks."

There was a long moment of silence until Namjoon sighed. "I have to go. I'm in school, too, you know? But I promise we'll go get something nice after school."

"Okay, Namjoonie," you agreed, standing up and wiping off your tears.

"Love you, sis," he said through the phone.

"Love you, too."

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Again, I am so sorry for just now getting this done. I hope you can forgive me~