XPLR | Colby Brock

~53~

(TW: suicide, abuse)

Disclaimer: my father does not beat me and my mother is still alive. They are happily married with two daughters, me being the youngest. Thank you. Also, thank you for 200k. I'm sorry I had to give you such a depressing chapter for the new milestone. -V (deodee), Author of XPLR.
"Happy birthday, Rosie!" Rose's mother sang as she pushed a large box towards the new twelve-year-old.

Rose smiled excitedly at both her parents, her mother and her father, who's going on five years of sobriety. It's been a great five years.

Her family went on vacations every year, they had a dog, and both her parents had good jobs. It was the highest time in Rose's life. Nothing would bring her family down.

Rose ripped of the floral wrapping paper, and the word "Yamaha" was written big on the side. The size and the brand name was enough for Rose to know what this is.

She smiled wide at her parents. "No way!" she said excitedly. Her mother nodded.

Her father had been pretty pissed when Rose said she didn't want a party or anything. Maybe a cake, and she'd be happy. He was also pretty annoyed that he had to miss his AA meeting, but Rose was pretty sure that on the inside, he was glad he didn't have to go. He saw it as a chore of his probation, not a spiritual help for his alcoholism.

The other people in the program always described him as a "dry drunk". He doesn't drink anymore, but he overindulges in other things. Right now, it's food. Rose's mother and her each had one slice of cake, and he pretty much ate the rest.

Rose opened the box with a smile, and there was that beautiful, shiny keyboard she's wanted for years and would still be using seven years later. "Oh, wow! Thank you, Mom, Dad!" She said, standing up to hug them both.

Birthdays were always a special occasion in the Romano household. Well, for Rose anyway. She'd save up money all year for both their birthdays, though she has to admit that she was always more excited for her mother's birthday.

Lilly and Rose Romano had the relationship every mother and daughter should have. They were closer than they could be, even though Lilly had her daughter at seventeen, she never resented Rose for stealing her future.

Lilly Romano was on the rise, going on to be an extraordinary pianist. Just like she had always hoped for her daughter.

She was gorgeous, talented, kind, the perfect woman. Then she fell in love with a man, the high school outcast. He was mysterious and handsome. She was the popular girl. They were polar opposites, but they were absolutely crazy about each other.

At seventeen, Lilly King and Lars Romano conceived a child. A baby girl.

Lilly was so excited, but Lars on the other hand, was not. In fact, everyone was angry except Lilly. Lilly couldn't wait to have a child, to have someone she could share her passion for music with. Someone she could love and would always love her as well.

Lars Romano and Lilly King wed on the fourth of March, three months and twenty-seven days before the birth of their child which they named Rose Porter Romano. She had her mother's eyes, and most exciting, her mother's hands.

Lilly gave birth to her daughter alone, with her grandmother beside her. The only family Lilly had that didn't cut her off. Unfortunately, the baby girl would never be able to know her great-grandmother.

Lars appeared an hour after Rose had been returned to her mother. A healthy, beautiful baby girl. Rose Porter Romano. Rose Porter Romano. Rose Porter Romano.

It was bliss, the happiest time in Lilly's life. They had a tiny apartment, but Lilly didn't care about what she had. She was perfectly happy with her husband and their daughter.

But of course, the bliss didn't last long. Lars began drinking again, and heavily, coming home at the wee hours of the night, waving up the baby, trying to hold and care for her while he was drunk.

When Rose was three months old, Lars came home while Lilly was sleeping, went straight to her crib, and in his drunken rage, he lifted her up out of her cribs and mercilessly dropped her to the ground, a five feet tumble.

Rose shrieked, waking Lilly. Lilly would've done anything to protect her dear daughter. That night, she left. She didn't return for five years.

Lars has sworn he'd changed, so Lilly trusted him and brought her young daughter back to his home, their tiny apartment in Oregon.

There they would stay. They had no other but to stay.

The same thing happened for two more years. Lilly would run away with Rose, or leave Rose at her friends house, or live with her friend and Rose. If Lilly and her friend hadn't lost touch, she could've changed Rose's entire life.

When Rose turned seven, Lars became sober. He had started going to AA and trying the program, but he wasn't exactly sober and Rose knew that. He started to eat a lot, and quickly became overweight.

And without any warning, he just started to drink again. And his abusive tendencies came back. But Lilly was determined to stay and make it work this time. She joined Al-Anon and tried her best, but when Rose entered her freshman year, she was ecstatic to tell Lilly that she had a solo in the concert because her orchestra director thought she was that good. At fourteen.

Lilly wanted to go see the concert so bad, she wanted Lars to go as well. To go support their daughter for one of the biggest moments in her short life.

Lars denied and forced Lilly to stay home from the concert. Even though Al-Anon always told Lilly that she had choices, she was scared of upsetting her husband to the point of killing her, because he'd threatened to do so himself.

She also didn't want Rose to get in a fight with her father, since Rose had a temper and a confidence to her that would fade away by the time she turned nineteen. Lilly was scared Lars would kill Rose in his drunk rage, just like he almost did when she was three months old.

So she got in that fateful fight with Rose, the fight that would change her daughter's life forever, then she helped her get ready for the concert in a red dress Lilly and Rose had saved up so much money for, it was the same dress Rose had worn all through high school, and sent her on her way to her concert.

When Lilly returned home, her husband of fourteen years beat her, and in her depressed state she decided to take the secret of her abusive husband to the grave.

She tied a rope to her ceiling fan and hung herself with her husband passed out drunk in the next room.

Rose Porter Romano, Lilly King-Romano's beloved daughter, returned home that night with a white rose gifted to her by the conductor and some excited news for her mother, but as she searched the house for Lilly, Rose happened upon her hanging, dead corpse.

At the age of thirty-one, after fourteen years of hell, Lilly King finally found peace, unknowingly leaving her daughter to burden all the weight of her husband's explosive anger.

And just like that, Rose's life changed just as much as she did.

But at least that life insurance check she took out on herself is in Rose's name. One day, when she needs it, she'll find the forms.