Before you knew

35. Light.

We sit in silence as I look at his hands in his lap while I sit on my knees in front of him still.

'We're okay. We have to be.'

I look up at his eyes when he starts to talk.
I pull my eyes away from him just as quickly.

'I'm sorry about what I said yesterday. I can talk to you, I know that.' I say. He huffs 'you can, but you have to want to as well.' He says. I look up at him again before moving to sit next to him.

I sit against him as I hesitate before talking.

'Some day....

Some day I'll show you my world.'

He wraps his arm around my shoulders and he pulls me more into him.
I really want to. I want him to know. I want him to become part of that world.
Brighten the place up, even a little bit.

'I want you to be a part of it.' I say.

'I bet it's an interesting place.' He says. I scoff and laugh a little while looking down at my hands. 'Interesting...'
The night grows darker and later as we sit next to each other in the yellow golden light of the little lamp next to the bed.

'If anything bothers you again, or if you need to talk.... go to Nick for me. For the both of us.'
I look up, surprised by his words. 'If anyone can help you, it's him.' He says. He can too, though it's different.

I want him to unravel the darkest parts of my memories.
I don't want him to just help, or just listen while I talk about my problems.
I want him to unravel it all.

'I don't need someone to talk to any longer.' I say. He turns his head and looks down at me. 'Then what do you need?' He asks. 'I need someone to fix the broken strings. Brighten the darkness a little.' I say. He looks away, so it's my turn to look at him.

The yellow light shines brightly behind him.
'I'll try.'