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I was back in Germany, sadly.

Back to work, back to reality, and back to focusing on my career. These days off were amazing, getting to enjoy with Oscar for a whole week was exactly what i needed before getting my mind back in the game. Even tho, saying goodbye was hard, and we were so dramatic about it like we wouldn't see each other for years, I was gonna see him in just two weeks, in Azerbaijan for the next race. Well, we weren't sad about not seeing each other the first two weeks, it was more about the fact that when we saw each other it wasn't gonna be the same and we couldn't act as freely as we wished. We had to keep everything private and try to not have anyone know anything outside our friend group, and that was gonna suck, not being able to be affectionate in public was gonna be torture, but we had to.

I was scared. I couldn't stop overthinking on my plane here, what if we made a mistake and the whole world found out? the hate I got was gonna multiply and it was gonna get harder and harder to ignore. Right now is somewhat "manageable", if you could say so. But then, it's gonna be like a whole tsunami of hate and angry people.

— Hey, are you okay? why didn't you make snarky comments when I had a better time than you? — asks Mick as we leave the facilities.

We spent the whole day here, meeting after meeting, debriefing the races we have had until now, and preparing for the ones to come. Then simulator job and training.

— Yeah i'm fine, i'm just really into my thoughts today, sorry. — I smile at him and we get into his car.

— ¿And what are your thoughts about? You know you can tell me anything, right?

I sigh and nod, putting on my seatbelt.— I know Mick, and I love you for it, i'm just being stupid, you know, overthinking everything instead of enjoying it.

— That's not stupid at all.— he says, turning the car on and driving off.— You're a human being, I think that means that overthinking is a part of it. Everyone does it, I do it all the time.

— ¿You do?

— Mhm, I mean now not so much, but my years in Haas, god, there wasn't a second of the day I didn't spend overthinking everything.— he scoffs and looks at me.— If I was good enough, if I could live up to my father's name, why wasn't as good as everyone expected me to be, why people expect so much of me, and many more things.

— And what did you do to stop thinking about that stuff?

— I talked, with my father and close friends. It helps a lot to get everything out with people you trust and love. — he makes a turn and stops at a red light.— Now, if you want I can stop at my favorite coffee place, drive us to a nice place and we can talk, if you don't, I can drive straight home and I will not say a word about it unless you do first.

I thought about it for a moment. It would be nice to speak my mind, I have only done it with Ivy a few times, but these past few days we haven't talked much, she's busy with work and studying, and due to timezones it was harder. And Mick was a great person to do this with.

— Sure then, ¿what's your favorite coffee shop? — I say with a smile which he returns.

— Oh you're gonna love it!

He focuses on the road and turns the radio on, I take the chance to go on my phone and text Oscar.

He focuses on the road and turns the radio on, I take the chance to go on my phone and text Oscar

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