lust // h.s.

part 2 // pity party

I was reading your guys comments on the last chapter and there is so many curse words that wattpad is blocking them. I find it really funny and I'm glad you guys are enjoying my updates. This is a filler by the way. 😋

The door being slammed shut left the room shaking, along with myself.

I couldn't hold back the tears anymore, and like a barricade being broken they came down my cheeks heavily. I leaned against the wall, and slowly slid down to the floor where I rested my head in hands. "Lottie?"

It was Niall. I could recognize his thick Irish drawl from anywhere, everything he said sounded so exotic no matter how dull.

Feeling worthless, I spoke up. My voice was small and trembling, cracking with every word I said. "Just leave, Niall."

His footsteps moved across the wooden floor, and his body kneeled next to mine.

I fought against him, trying to push him away. But he continued to reach towards me, and after several failed attempts to swat him away I stopped, allowing his right arm to tuck beneath the folds of my knees, and his left around my shoulders.

"You can't just sit in here, silly." He whispered, picking me up.

He brought me into his room, I could tell it was his by the brisk smell of musk. Like old leather bound books, mixed with a minty scent.

I was a crying, emotional mess as he set me on the bed and gently pulled away my shoes and jeans and then tucking me into the large mattress.

He followed, wrapping his arms around me. "Shh," he pleaded. "Your going to be alright."

I heard a bunch of screaming outside, and slamming doers and cursing. I just felt bad. Flat out.

Niall's hand rubbed circles in the flat of my back, as I pressed my head into his bare chest. "Everything is fine princess." He repeated, trying to drain out the yelling. But I could hear most of it clear as day.

Liam's was the voice that raged above the others. "You better fucking leave, and calm yourself down before you even think of seeing her again, let alone talking to her!"

"I'll see her whenever I fucking want, she's mine - and you can't do anything about it!" Harry yelled back.

There was a lot more yelling that I couldn't make out, as the rain was so heavy that it was blocking the words out. When after a few minutes there was a silence, like calm before a storm. And then I heard Louis, "We're not going to let you brainwash her like you did to Kate!"

The words stung: Brainwash? What was that supposed to mean?

As if simultaneously with the yelling, my cries got louder, and I began to fight for air. Not in a life threatening way, but an ugly cry kind of way.

"Shh, just calm down."

Niall moved his hand across my ear and covered it, while pressing his lips to the spot between my hairline and left eye.

His soft words began to drown out the fighting around us and I began to drift.

Falling into a strange daze, I thought back to when Niall and I had been close. We'd been so close. I remember him holding me those weeks that Harry had left, and helping me. He was easy to talk to, but practically a stranger. I didn't know anything about him, and meanwhile he knew everything about me. There must be something about him, and there defiantly was. It made me feel at home, and safe and warm. Two things I felt very rarely. But why was I so lenient towards people? People I didn't even know? Why did I just let them walk all over me? Honestly; I had no clue. It didn't make any sense to me, I always felt like I was a strong willed person and that I stood up for myself. When in reality, I was just a lame excuse for a dreamer. I wanted things that I knew could happen. Which really proved itself in Harry and I's relationship.

I just felt the need to throw myself a pity party, and here it was. With party hats, gift bags, and the cake with big read icing letters that read:

Your life is a mess.

And then I was gone.