Until My Last Breath

Chapter 31

Rose's POV:
I wake up to the sound of my alarm. Probably the best part about tour is that I almost never need to stand up at half past 6 am like I need to for school. That's like a dream.

The only thing crushing my dream is that I still haven't studied. My exams are nowhere near but I should always be on top with all the stuff since it's my senior year.

At least I'm not a bad student. The only thing I should be careful with is maths and history. I just don't like these subjects. Groaning, I stretch myself, before heading into the bathroom to take a shower and wash my hair.

The warm water runs soothingly down my skin and it remind me of how Shawn stroked my back as he woke me up from that nightmare. Did I dream that yesterday or did I just ignore him and fall asleep?

I was so tired, I honestly can't remember but it why would he be in front of my door in the middle of the night? I shrug, washing the shampoo out if my hair before stepping out and wrapping it into a towel.

With another towel around my body I stroll into my room checking if I packed everything. I was about to change into my clothes as the door opens causing me to let out a squeak.

"I'm also excited to see you!" Ava laughs, walking in and sitting onto the bed. "Oh my god Ava I thought you-" "Were someone else? Can I guess who?" she grins, leaning onto her hands.

"No but what about you learn that you can knock on doors before walking into a room." "Sorry sorry." She chuckles and I disappear into the bathroom once again to change into a black high waisted jeans and a yellow short hoodie. I walk out, drying my hair a bit with a towel.

"What are you grinning at now?" I ask, rolling my eyes. "How was the car ride with Shawn?" "Pretty long since we got stuck in a snowstorm almost freezing our asses of you know." I reply. "You know what I mean. Was he mad that you slapped Grace? Oh that was awesome by the way." Ava questions, letting out a chuckle.

"At first yes but then he actually said he believes me about the medicine." I explain, while combing my wet hair. "Really? Wow, maybe there are some brain cells in his head." Ava says, making me giggle. "Yeah maybe some..."

I repeat, shaking my head as I keep recreating our conversation. I just wish I wouldn't have told him. I mean someone else would probably say that it doesn't matter because everyone knows about my... accident on the bridge but I hate it when people think that they are suddenly therapists and tell me how to get better. I actually feel guilty that Carter doesn't know but Shawn does.

I don't want to tell him though. He would just be worried all over again. „Anything else?" Ava questions, wiggling her eyebrows. I turn the blow dryer on, sticking my tounge out, causing her to pout.

"Hey come on!" I chuckle, pointing towards my ear as a sign that I ‚,can't' hear her. Ava rolls her eyes, letting her head fall back on the mattress. I finish getting ready and sit down next to her to check my phone. I see that I got a message from Carter but as I was about to reply I feel her presence behind me.

„Ouhhh is that why you don't admit you like Shawn? Because you have a boyfriend?" I shut my phone off turning to her with raised eyebrows.

„First of all no. Carter is my best friend and why would I admit something that isn't true?" I question. „It's just how you look at him sometimes. You mostly look at him like you want to stab him right on the spot but sometimes even if it's just a liiiitle bit I see that you are blushing when he says something nice.

Which is rare I know but still." She answers, nudging my arm. „Tell me one good reason why I would come together with someone who hates me,  besides that with a person who I hate aswell? Also he has a girlfriend you know.
So please can you just stop annoying me? Open a fanpage for us if you have to fangirl." I say.

„Aww it's cute how you try to search excuses. So if he hates you why was he asleep in front of your door today morning?" She asks chuckling , standing up from the bed. Wait what?

I scrunch my eyebrows together, observing her amused face. He slept in front of my door? Is that why I heard him?"

„I'm kidding! Look who's as red as a tomato now!" she laughs, clutching her stomach. „God Ava. Just leave, you are tugging on my nerves already." I groan. „Alright alright. See you at the airport." She chirps before leaving the room. So I just imagined that?

What is wrong with me.... I'm asking myself that a lot lately. Sighing, I grab my suitcase and bag before walking down into the lobby were Andrew is already waiting. "Good Morning Rose. Everything okey since yesterday?" He asks, heading with me towards the exit.

"Yeah everything is fine. Nothing freezed off of me." I reply, causing him to chuckle. "Perfect, we need all of you at the shoot today. Geoff told you right?" I nod, still not really fond of the idea but I guess I just have to get trough it. 

We walk towards the cars and after everything is packed into the trunks I sit in. "Hey." I hear someone say. I look up to see Shawn sitting in the back next to me. "Hi." I respond, focusing back onto my phone. I could feel his gaze on me, making me look up once again.

"What?" I question, raising my eyebrow. "Nothing." Shawn shakes his head, looking out if the window while his  fingers are playing with his ring. Okey...

"I talked to Grace." He speaks up, clearing his throat. "Okey?" I say. "She didn't admit it but I found some pills in her make up bag. I know it's no use now but I'm sorry for that." "Yeah... thanks I guess." I reply. "Rose-"

"Alright guys! Ready for Milan?" Geoff asks, sitting into the front with Andrew. "Of course." Shawn chuckles, scratching his neck. I'm just gonna ignore him now. I'm not even gonna start wondering why he is like that.

After putting my headphones in I lean my head against the window, just listening to music. I spend the flight like this aswell, trying to blend out all the fans taking pictures of us, holding hands and being happy.

"Guys, the photoshoot is around 6 pm so we still have enough time to record the song." Andrew explains as we arrive at the studio. We walk in and I look around, being quiet impresses by the decoration and everything.

The room has a cool vibe. I sit down on the couch, just watching them prepare everything. I could feel Shawn's gaze on me every now and then, making me remember what Ava said. Do I really blush that often around him?

I bite my lip holding Shawn's intense look as he stands behind the glass in a small room. His eyes move from mine down to my mouth. "Rose?" "Hm?" I ask, puzzled as Geoff approaches me. I finally pry my eyes off Shawn moving them to Geoff. "Could you please help me get a the suitcases from the other room?" "Sure." I respond frowning.

Why me? Well, the others seem busy so that's probably why. "Can I ask you something?" "You already did but yes." I say, walking next to him. He chuckles lightly before stopping and closing the door.

"Look, I really don't want to make you uncomfortable with asking you that but... are you hurting yourself?" He questions, looking down at me worried.
"First of all no." I say, biting my tongue to not get angry again.

„Second of all why would it matter? You didn't forget why I am here hopefully." "No I didn't but that doesn't mean that you have to go trough this alone." "Geoff I know you mean to be friendly but please, I don't like it when people interfere in my life. So were are the suitcases?"

Geoff sighs, before walking towards the door. "Here is Shawn's and your's. I'll get the others." He says, before walking out. I sigh, kneeling down grab the suitcase. I try to lift it and of course it has to be opened slightly causing a box and some clothes to spill out.

Silently cursing myself I pick up the box to put it back into the suitcase but a picture catches my attention. Is that Grace? But she has longer hair than the girl on the picture. Maybe it's an old photo.

I look over to the door making sure that Geoff doesn't come in before opening the small black box. A bracelet and letter are in there and again some pictures.

That's Shawn and Grace I think. Wow didn't think that they are the cute kind of couple. I open the piece if paper, looking down onto the name. What...? That's not Grace's name?

I was about to read the letter as I hear a thud against the door. I quickly put the things back in,m acting like I'm just taking the suitcase. Sorry but I'm curious...