My Thoughts On Paper

Part Sixty-One Depression

(A/N Pic is not mine)

I want to go back

Even though I have grown so much

I wish to go back

So I can have that excuse

To make those pretty lines

To say those petty lies

Back when things were simple

Yet so complicated

When everything about me I hated

I sit here

Heart pounding

Thoughts swarming

Hands twitching

Back aching

The minutes turn to hours

The same thought runs through me

I try to correct it

I think of other things

Yet it all comes back to that thought

I fit in nowhere

I lie in bed awake

No one cares about me

I'm a fucking mistake

If I disappeared you would forget

Don't try to lie

I can see it in your eyes

I miss my mom

Won't she come back

She must be disappointed

My heart aches all I want is to see

You get one phone call

Can I make it to heaven?

If I do it will he forgive me?

If I do it will he pull me down to hell

God I need you

Where are you

Let me see you

I can't do it on my own

I'm over the edge

Please catch me

I want to go back

Even though I have grown so much

I wish to go back

So I can have that excuse

To make those pretty lines

To say those petty lies

Back when things were simple

Yet so complicated

When everything about me I hated

I hate me

No one cares

Goodbye