My Thoughts On Paper

Cracked Mirror

(Yes, the picture is mine, I drew it a long time ago. Though I do not feel this way as often in this poem, I do feel this way sometimes.)

The wind outside is howling

Like my heart inside

Let the storm carry on

Inside my hollow soul

I want to feel indifferent

But all I feel is pain

As I lay here on this bed

Dark thoughts inside my head

I see

The storm inside me

I walk through these hallways

I see shadows around every corner

Provoking me

Telling me to follow

My heart tells me to run

But my head seems to listen to the dark

I crack the mirror

Of a perfect image

That everyone wants me to be

The red hot blood

Running out of my knuckles

I cradle to my chest

My heart is in pain

The heartbreak

Settles in

I just want to scream

But I swallow the urge

No one around me

Wants to hear me screech

I wince

But it feels all too good

To finally feel something

No one can ever love

A broken girl like me

I try so hard to never

Push away people I love

But my head wants me to be lonely

As it puts all my happy thoughts

To the back of my mind

Don't leave me alone

I don't know what I will do

I search blindly in the dark

For the light of the full moon

But the waves crash over me

In sadness and in pain

I start to drown

In my own thoughts and fears

In doubts

In pain

I sink to the bottom of the sea

Suffocating

As lies are thrown down my throat

Like depressions hands are slowly throttling me

My mind likes to lie

My eyes never see

My ears never hear

My fingers always ache

My mouth tells lies

I am not fine

I am not tired

I am here

I am real

I am sad

I am mad

I am never glad

Let me smile

I hate to frown

Where is my laugh

Where is my life

Save me

Before I hurt me

Falling in Depressions cold embrace