My Thoughts On Paper

What I said

I am sorry

For what I said

When I was

Hungry

Excited

Nervous

Depressed

I can't control my emotions

I can't control

What comes out of my mouth

When I feel the darkness slipping in

I write what I can

To the let the light in

I trust you

I love you

But the paranoia

It takes me

Thinking you won't like me

Too many bad thoughts

Too many bad people

Want to take me down

Fill my head with nonsense

I know I don't make sense

I wish you would talk to me

I feel the light

Through the cracks

Of my broken heart and walls

You broke them too easily

How could I let you break them down

Was I too quick

Am I too forgiving

I can't say what I am thinking

I can't believe what I am hearing

You should make time for me

Ten hours a day I still make time for you

Too busy

Too busy for me

Then your words

I take it all back

I still have that darkness in my head

I still feel that tiny regret

Not for you

Never for you

But for me

That I gave in so easily

I'm scared

No, wait

I am terrified

What you do to me

Don't leave me behind

You are in my life

I can't do this twice

Again

I'm sorry

But my heart has been broken

Too many times

I need that reassurance

Please don't get mad

I am so broken

I need you bad

But don't think

That if you leave

I would be too broken to not stand up on my feet

I have done it before

I will do it again

But I really don't want you to go

I want you to know

I am sorry

For what I said

When I was

Hungry

Excited

Nervous

Depressed