CHAPTER 35

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Why can't we write realistically in school essays? That's a serious topic right?
This was the first time in a long time that I didn't have anything to write or say. It likes I was just... empty. Nothing was coming to me. I had my facts and I had what to write about. But how should I start this? I don't know. How do I start this?
The world is ending
Nope.
People are ruining this planet?
No. It was all true, but not something my teacher would grade as true.
It was Friday afternoon, I was exhausted. I didn't want to do school, and I had to hand this in by 12:00 tonight.
I sigh staring at the blank computer screen.
"Blah! Blah! Blah! Blah!" I mutter.
Music? Would that help? Probably.

I go onto YouTube scrolling through the music. What to play? This is a great way to take up my time. I click on the Story of my Life video. Maybe crying could help me? This video... and let's be honest, all the One Direction songs make me cry.
I lean back against the wall watching the video.
Just as the music starts... I ball. Oh god. When Louis's part comes up about his grandparents!!
That was an automatic cry, and I think it was subconsciously more than just this video. Aka, my essay that's due.

By the time the video is done, I was still crying. Then I proceeded to play Little Things.
I wipe my tears with my shirt. THEY'RE BROKEN UP!! Does that not hurt anyone else!? It's the hardest thing I've been through!
Okay... I needed to take a step back and maybe realize that... I'm a psychopath bitch! Holy shit man. I'm sobbing because of a boy band. I'm sure I'm not the only one doing it. But still dude. My eyes were blurry from the tears, I don't remember the last time I cried like this. Yes, I do, there are too many occasions that this has happened to me.

I watch a couple more old videos. Then force myself to start my essay. Still crying.
I sniffle typing some words out, but I delete it. I wipe my eyes and sigh.
"Ughhhhhh!" I groan. "What the fuck!" I sigh.
I think this is what university does to you. The first month is good and fresh, then you hit the other months and you go downhill. It was already the beginning of November. Next month we had midterms. Imagine the stress then. This was just an essay.
I leave back hitting my head against the wall. I went from eating fries to crying about an essay within 20 minutes.
I type out my name on the top, space down and then I hover.
School... SUCKS!?

Imagine I just sent that in. I really wish I could. I cover my face with my hands and groan, still kind of crying because... life!? I'm exhausted and stressed. My phone rings out and I grab it wiping my eyes. Isaac's name pops up and I answer.

"Hey!" He says.
"Hey," I reply.
"What's up?" He asks and I sniffle before answer.
"Not much. Doing school stuff," I mutter.
"Are you crying?" He asks and I laugh.
"Yeah," I mumble.
"Why?" He asks.
"I'm having a mental break down," I admit.
"Are you listening to One Direction!?" He questions and it makes me laugh again.
"Yes," I mutter. "And I don't know what to write for my essay," I add and he laughs. "How did you know?"
"Because I know you," he says. "Stop doing it."
"No, I can't. Plus school is making that harder for me," I remark. "I have to hand it in by tonight and I don't have a single word written!" I exclaim. "What do I do?" I whine just as some more tears escape my eyes for absolutely no reason.
"You should start by taking a breath," he tells me. "It's just an essay. You always end up finishing them with a good grade," he says.
"I don't know. 3000 words dude," I mumble. "7 hours. Less now."
"You helped me!" He encourages but he didn't sound too convinced. "I'm sure if you really try it will come to you."
"No. Today's just not the day," I mumble.
"That's probably because I left," he states and I could hear the smirks on his lips.
"Shut up!" I let out a single laugh and he chuckles.
  "You gonna be okay?" He asks.
  "I always am," I mutter. "Goes your mom?"
  "She's good," he says, but it didn't sound convincing. "she was surprised."
  "Yeah," I say. "Happy?"
  "No. She hated that I showed up randomly," he says sarcastically.
  "I would," I reply.
  "That's not even true!" He says and I roll my eyes.
  "How was the drive?" I ask.
  "Decent. I was performing. You missed out on that," he tells me and I laugh.
  "Damnit."
  "Yeah," he sighs. "Now... I'm just chilling in my room. My mom has the neighbour over for coffee," he says.
  "You're telling me you don't want to sit with your mom and her friend having coffee? And talk to me instead? Wow," I say and he laughs. "I feel important."
  "You should," he says. "My mom and her friends are so cool. It's crazy that I'm talking to you instead," he jokes. "Clearly destiny lead me here because you're crying and I should probably help with that," he tells me.
  "No one can help me. I cried for no reason, so there's nothing to even help. Just a psychopath... having yet another mental breakdown" I state and he chuckles.
  "It happens to the best of us," he says.
We stay silent for a second. "Do you have any plans for the weekend?" He asks.
  "Yeah, I'm hanging out with Rachael and Ryan and some other friends of Ryan," I reply. "How about you?"
  "What do you mean? I'm hanging out with my mom," he laughs.
  "I'm not that dumb. I mean, what are you guys gonna do?" I ask.
  "Oh," he says. "I don't know," he sighs. "We might binge-watch a show together..." he drifts and it makes me smile. "Nothing big I guess."
His voice was in a tone, not a too happy one. He's been getting into these little moods and I think it's because of his mom. He's been super worried about her.
  "Yeah, that sounds nice though," I quip.
  "Mhm," he hums.
  "Did you tell her I said hi?" I ask.
  "Yeah," he says. "She says hi back," he remarks. "Let's be honest, she hasn't met you and she already likes you," he tells me and I smile.
  "That's not surprising. I'm amazing," I shrug like he could see.
  "Yeah I guess..." he mutters. "You're decent."
  "Oh shut it. You know that I am the best person you've ever met," I state.
  "I mean, I've met Bill Nye the science guy before... I think he's the best person I've met," he says.
  "Wait, you've met Bill Nye!? The science guy!?" I ask incredulously.
  "Yeah. Have I not told you this before!?" He asks and I shake my head like he could see.
  "Dude! I'm so jealous!" I said. "I love him."
  "Yeah. It was the best moment of my life," he laughs. "I went to a science fair thing when I was like 13 and met him. He's even cooler in real life," he says.
  "BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GUY!! BILL, BILL, BILL!" I sing and he laughs. "He was my biggest role model, I don't even like science."
  "Yeah, you're about to be even more jealous," he says.
  "Oh god! What!?"
  "I have a signed poster," he utters and I literally gasp.
  "No!" I say.
  "Yeah."
  "No!"
  "Yeah. I still have it hung up here on my wall," he laughs.
  "ISAAC!" I exclaim.
  "I know."
  "Oh my god," I groan. "I wish."
  "Should I bring it back!?" He asks.
  "Yes," I nod. "I want to see it. I want proof."
  "I can send a picture," he chuckles.
  "No, I'll be even more jealous," I sigh. "I can't believe this."
  "Yeah. I feel like I own the world right now," he says smugly and I roll my eyes.
  "Don't get annoying," I say and he chuckles. "You're lucky though."
  "Yeah," he says.
  "Lucky," I said again. "Weird word right?" I ask and he laughs. "I'm serious. Saying it sounds weird sometimes. Plus... lucky," I roll my eyes at it. Who's lucky!?
  "Yeah," he agrees. "I get what you mean. Luck, being lucky. Kind of dumb," he says.
  "Like good luck... sounds like lick with a u," I laugh.
  "Yeah, it's what it is," he laughs.
  "Whatever."
  "You doing good Blue?" He asks.
  "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" I ask.
  "I don't know random crying, saying luck is weird and dumb," he says. "Is something happening!?"
  "Oh my god," I sigh. "I'm extravagant."
  "Okay... good," he says and I laugh.
I look down at the laptop. Still an empty page.
  "I have to write this dumb assignment," I sigh.
  "Right," he says. "Want help?"
  "You couldn't even write a science essay Isaac, I'm good," I say and he laughs.
  "Okay. I was just being nice," he says. "Does this mean I have to get off the phone?"
  "No, you can stay on," I put it on speaker putting it on my book and staring at the laptop. "I just don't know what to write."
  "Just write whatever comes to mind and then edit it," he tells me. That wasn't a bad idea. "Do you think if I sing it'll help?"
  "Definitely not," I laugh.
  "Rude!" He laughs with me.
  "Just like talk. I might not reply," I tell him and start to do what he said. Just write what I wanted and then I'll edit it.
  "Okay," he says. "Should I tell you a story?" He asks and laughs at himself. I roll my eyes typing. "You rolled your eyes didn't you?"
  "Yeah," I admit and he laughs.
  "I know you so well Liv."
I continue typing while he tells me about some stupid things he did when he was a kid.

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