CHAPTER 61

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Sunday was one of those days, Isaac had a hangover... not surprising. I was tired and getting coffee... also not surprising. So it was gonna be a boring, lazy day.

I was at the cafe with Rachael getting coffee, because... why not?
  "So... when did Isaac show up in our room?" Rachael asks as I grab my coffee and take a sip of it. She grabs her own.
  "Sometime after you went to bed," I shrug. "He was drunk."
  "Drunk?" She laughs. "Did he go to that party with Dylan last night?"
  "No, they were just drinking," I reply.
  "Ooh fun," she says. "So he drunkenly showed up to you because he's obsessed," she states. "Makes sense. Please don't tell me you guys had sex while I was in the other bed!"
  "Rachael!" I say. "I'm not that disrespectful," I add and she laughs.
  "I don't know," she shrugs.
  "I know you would've done it," I nudge her as we walk out and she laughs again. "Plus we haven't had sex."
  "No, I wouldn't!" She says. "And I would hop on his dick right away. Look at the guy."
  "Oh hey!" I hear and look over to see Jude.
  "Hey!" I smile and I see Rachael's smile drop when she sees him. "What're you doing? Your backpack is on and it's Sunday?"
  "I was out," he shrugs. "I was gonna go get food, you guys wanna come?" He asks.
  "Where?" I ask.
  "That diner," he says. "Close by."
  "Oh shit! I start work tomorrow!" I state. "I almost forgot."
  "You're stupid," Rachael laughs at me and I push her.
  "I'm down to go eat," I nod. "Rach?" I look at her.
"No, I actually have an assignment to finish by tomorrow," she sighs. "See you later?" she asks and I nod. She walks off with her coffee in hand.
"She hates me doesn't she?" Jude asks and I laugh.
"She doesn't like you," I say and he nods with a chuckle.
"Because I didn't call her hot?" He asks and we start walking.
"Yeah."
"Oh well... I didn't really like her either," he says.
"She also hates that you don't like her," I add.
"It's weird to me that you're friends with her," he says.
"Why?" I ask.
"Because... she's really different. Like I understand Ella because there are some similarities," he laughs.
"Yeah, she's really preppy and a party goer, and total opposite of me," I nod. "But she's cool."
"Okay, I won't judge," he nods. "So where do you work?"
"The diner," I say.
"Oh really?" He asks. "You're gonna have to get me free food!"
"That's not how that works," I laugh. "Isaac said the same thing."
"Hey, I like Isaac," he says. "He's nice."
"Yeah, he's cool," I nod.
"Cool," he laughs. "Your boyfriend is just cool?"
"Shut up," I mumble. "You wanna know what he said to me last night," I say.
"What?" He asks.
"So he came to my place drunk, for some reason," I sigh. "And he told me he was falling in love with me," I admit.
"Ooh," he says. "That's good right?"
"Yeah, but he was just drunk," I say.
"Drunk words, speak sober thoughts," he tells me.
"Not always," I say.
"Don't be annoying," he retorts. "Are you not falling in love with him? Is that the problem?"
"No," I mutter. "It's kind of the opposite."
"So, what's the issue?"
"I'm scared," I say. "Yeah, me and Alex had a high school relationship, but I should learn maybe not to trust so easy when it comes to that..." I shrug.
He was in an emotional state with his mom. I'm sure he's being irrational.
"Oh Liv," Jude sighs. "You confuse me."
"Why?" I laugh and he shrugs. "Shut up, and let's go eat."
"Fine ass-face," he says and we both laugh.

We get to the diner, and I see Peni pouring coffee into someone's cup. She turns and smiles when she sees me.
  "Liv!" She chirps putting the coffee pot down and walking over. "I missed you," she hugs me.
  "Hey," I say.
  "Dude, when do you start work again? I need you here!" She tells me and I laugh.
  "Tomorrow," I said and she nods.
  "I work tomorrow too!" She grins. She looks over to Jude. "Oh sorry, how rude. I'm Penelope!" She says.
  "Jude," he grins. I see him staring at her for a second and I grin.
  "Just you two?" She asks and I nod.
We sit down and she comes with her notepad.
  "Drinks?" She asks.
  "I have my coffee," I say.
  "I'll get water," Jude tells her and she nods.
  "Be right up!" She smiles and walks off.
  "She's hot," Jude tells me and I laugh.
  "I could tell you thought so," I nod.
  "Really? How?"
  "The way you looked at her," I remark. "I'm very observant Jude."
  "Whatever," he says.
  "I do think she has a boyfriend though," I say.
  "It's not like I love her," he laughs.
  "Okay, Okay," I say.
She comes back with the water.
  "You guys ready to order?" She asks pulling out her pen and pad.

~

I walk into my dorm and it was empty. I throw my bag onto my bed and go to my closet to put on some more comfortable clothes. I slip into some sweats and a baggy graphic tee.
I didn't have much to do, so I should probably catch up on my homework that I've been procrastinating.
I grab my laptop and books and sit down on my bed.

But when I pulled up my homework, my mind drifts almost immediately to Isaac. To Isaac last night, drunk. Falling in love with me?
I was so scared to put myself out there. Alex... he let me down and lied, and there's always been that something that stuck with me about my real dad. I've always had these weird trust issues, even when I have nothing wrong with me. It's just so hard to put yourself in a vulnerable situation to say I love you again. Even though I know what me and Alex has wasn't real love... it was that high school thing, where you think it's real love. I feel different with Isaac. So different, and that feeling terrified me.
I push my laptop back and groan.
Why did he always have to be on my mind! Literally all the time! I close my eyes and run my hands over my face.
All I needed, was to concentrate on my school. But nope! Isaac filling my head with his cute ass! I sigh looking around the room. I cannot believe I was falling so hard for him. His everything.

I heard a knock on the door and I look at my phone to see it was 4:30 pm. Who could it be? I get off my bed and head to the door.
I open it to see Isaac standing there. Wow, speak of the devil. I smile and then my smile almost immediately drops when I see his eyes are red and bloodshot, and his nose is red. There were some tear streaks down his cheeks.

"Isaac," I say and he bites his lip.
"Liv," his voice was raspy, he just steps closer and hugs me. I wrap my arms around him and I felt so bad to see him like this.
"Hey... what's wrong?" I say in a low voice and I pull him into my room and shut the door. I knew it was probably because of his mom, but still.
"I... I.." he drifts. "I got a call.."
He pulls away from the hug and wipes his eyes. "Sorry," he says.
"Don't say sorry," I tell him. "Just tell me what happened.." I say.
We sit down on my bed and he leans back against the wall and rubs a hand over his face and through his hair.
"I got a call.." he mumbles. "It was... it was from a lawyer," his voice cracks. "It was for my mom's Will.."
"Oh.," I say.
"And that was fine..." he shakes his head. "But, when I was done with the call, I started having a panic attack," he says. "And you know..." he says his eyes wandering all over the room. "My mom..." he whispers. I grab his hand and rub circles on it.
"Hey, I know.. it's hard," I say. "You're allowed to cry. But you'll be okay," I said.
"Liv," he says. His voice cracks and I see his eyes water. "You said she'd be okay."
"I know."
"She's gone," he says. "She's really gone!" He adds. "I got a fucking call about my mom's will," he says.
"Isaac," I say.
"Liv," a tear rolls down. "I'm sorry... I just need you..." he says.
"Stop saying sorry," I tell him.
"I am though..." he says. "You shouldn't have to deal with me like this. You're just the only person... I have right now," he says. "And you're the only person that makes me feel better Liv."
"Stop it, Isaac, I'm always there for you, you don't need to say sorry..." I move some hair from his eye. He looks at him, his eyes still really red, sad. It made me sad for him.
"Liv..." he says closing his eyes. I lean in and kiss him. He lets out air from his nose and pulls me closer. I could feel it all from him, I could literally feel all his emotions right now. He cups my cheeks and I get on top of his lap.
I know, emotional moment and I'm ruining it with a kiss. But it works for when people have panic attacks or anxiety.
He cups my cheeks and he pulls me as close as I could get. He pulls away breathing out and then kisses my lips lightly once more.
  "Thank you," he says in a low voice. I shake my head.
  "You don't need to thank me," I say. He kisses me again and I run my hands through his hair.
And for some reason... it just clicked. It felt right, and I had this urge. I felt like it was right for me. I wanted to have sex with Isaac, and I wouldn't regret it.
I move my hands down to the hem of his shirt, and I lift it slightly. He lets me take it off of him. He kisses down my neck slowly and his hand moves down my side gripping my hip. He moves his other hand to the hem of my shirt and I let him take mine off.
He moves so I'm laying on my back and he's on top of me. I run my hands over his body and I pull away from his lips very slightly. He looks at me licking his lips. And without even saying anything, I felt like he knew, so I pull him down into a deep kiss before furthering it.

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