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September 21
He was different.

They all felt it.

They all saw it.

They all knew it.

Jin wasn't in the dorm again, he had left before dinner. The other six were going to wait, but as the time kept ticking and midnight struck, Namjoon had forced them all to sleep, promising he would stay up and wait.

Nira was going to talk to them tomorrow. They were forcing her to explain why Jin could recall his death- the very thing they were so desperate to stop.

Sitting at the kitchen island, Namjoon scrolled through his phone, pausing as he heard the door open. Standing up slowly, he placed the phone in his pocket, waiting. The second Jin walked into the front room, Namjoon scooped him up, the idol yelping.

"Its just me, " Namjoon chuckled and Jin relaxed, the younger setting him back on his to feet. With a sigh, Namjoon raised an eyebrow, " Midnight? Seriously?"

Jin looked down, "Just...go to bed,"

"Join me?" Namjoon hummed with a slight tease, brushing their lips.

Jin exhaled, placing his hands on Namjoon's shoulders, "I...have to wash up, "

"Then join me?"

"It'll be too late then!" Jim shook his head, "Just, go to bed,"

Namjoon scowled and then frowned, "You promised you'd tell me everything,"

"No, I promised I would tell you if I was struggling, " Jin denied, "I'm...fine,"

"You don't sound so sure,"

"Namjoon!" Jin exclaimed but it sounded desperate. Lowering to a whisper the elder pleaded, "Please?"

Namjoon sighed but nodded, "I'm trusting you, so I'm letting this go....again,"

"Thank you babe," Jin smiled weakly, but it was too dark for Namjoon to see the guilt in those brown orbs.

Sharing a range of soft kisses in the dimly lit room, the two separated to get their rest. Jin could only feel his guilt grow as Namjoon, whispered those three words that almost made him break down right there.

i love you.

What beautiful words they were, but how tainted they had become. Jin only smiled, giving a small peck on his lover's lips, before backing into his shared room and closing the door softly. Resting his head on the door for a few seconds, Jin sucked his breath, gently placing his bag down and peeling back to thick jacket.

He couldn't see the marks he knew were there. It was too dark. Things had changed and he knew that. Sijeon had changed his methods. He was being bolder. Ruder. Sharper. Harsher.

Rougher.

Grabbing a pair of sweat pants and a longsleeve shirt, Jin entered the bathroom. He shut the door first, hands groping the wall until he found the switch. When he flicked it on, he casted away from the mirror. He placed the clothes on the rack and turned the water on.

As he did so, he could see the blueish black bruises along his forearm and the tight marks of rope that had pricked at his wrists. Jin could only stare, before he finally had the guts to turn and fully look at himself.

It was hideous.

His hair was a mess and his eyes were puffy, nose red. His cheeks were fresh roses that had blossomed while his arms had the color of smog. A hand mark was around his neck and Jin could practically feel the air leaving him as if the hand was still there.

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