☆bts angsts

I'll love you + j.j.k [2]

I realized running from your problems won't make it easier.

EDITED.

🐜 < ant

"Care to share your thoughts?"

"I prefer to differ."
He rested his head at the wooden table. Lately, it feels as if his own life turned upside down. And on his mind, he could only hink of y/n's contemporaries. In which, he should not conceive.

"Something has been bother you jeongguk. Is it her?"
He slouched on his comfortable seat. The library has a high intolerance of talking aloud, but his friend really doesn't give a care. They were seated diagonally across eachother. He was holding a book to read. As he became slowly bothered.

"Jimin no. I have no interest in her i already told you that."

"Yeah and I'm doubting you."

So he rolled his eyes at jimin. Desperately trying to change the dreadful topic he was unwilling to talk about for almost a week.

"Just to inform you. Y/n's going on a vacation"

"That's one thing to be happy about."

"You might not be able to see her. It's for two weeks."
He gulped, thinking of a way to answer nonchalantly. A way to sassily overpower this lingeing feeling everytime he steals a glimpse of her.

"I could care less about her."

"Suit yourself jeongguk."

And so he watched jimin leave his seat. Which left him all alone. But someone walked in. Right infront of the door he's been staring at.

Y/n walked far away from him. Completely uninformed that his existence was even there. He never goes to libraries. And this was her favorite place to go for peace. And for some reason his feets dragged him here.

Her hands glided trough the books, smiling as she reads. He felt swept away. Feeling something he'd never once thought would happen. His eyes were only attached to her, and only her. Somehow he wouldn't stand up. And prefer to just sit there and observe her.

Something about her made him interested. For the first time.

And he hated the feeling. Because he had already rejected her. And he was pretty sure he doesn't like her.

He sighed to himself. Not taking his eyes off of her. He felt sinful, looking at her lips.

"I don't like her."

So he reassured himself. For comfort. And so he ignored her, leaving he area to get far away from her presence.

👠

In the corner of his eyes he saw, she was smiling. But not to him. She was talking, but not to him. She stared, but not to him. It was someone he was close with. He felt the urge to break them apart. Because taehyung didn't deserve her.

"Jeongguk what the hell"
Taehyung exclaimed, looking at him as if he was a psycho. Bo he could not explain what he felt towards her. He doesn't want to admit. So he punched taehyung, causing a commotion. He felt as if taehyung would steal her away from his grasp.

"Stop it jeon. You're hurting him!"
He watched as she held him in his arms. As if it should be him whom she held. Taehyung's bottom lip bled cluthing into y/n's arms. And he felt even more deceived.

"You'll come back to me y/n. You always do. You basically throw yourself to me. All the time."

She closed her eyes and sighed, placing taehyung to the nearest couch. She stood up, taking steps infront of him. Just now she noticed his bad parts. And how he made her a fool by falling inlove to him.

"You're scared Jeon."
She stood there, with the same emotionless face he once showed to her.

"What"

"You're scared that i won't come back."
She stalled him, as she saw his attitude flaws. He was conceited. Self absorbed. An she just wanted to facepalm herself to think that she had even ever taken a liking towards him.

"If you're so sure I'll come running back, just leave me be. Like you always do. Because you don't care. So why would you care about me coming back to you?"
And she turned her body away from him. To go and grab taehyung, heading towards the infirmary. So he was left there. Rethinking about life consequences. Whatever did he feel for her? That he became so attached to her personal life.

That made him punch his own friend. Just because of this, confusing feelings he felt. That he never thought he'd feel. Especially to her.

🐝 < bee

First week without her was hell. He'd be having unconventional anger issues as if he was irritated to everyone. So far, he still haven't figured out how he felt for her.

He kept his head low at the hallways, which was unusual. Moments he'd think of, was when she'd smile to him at the hallways. As if he's the only one who catches her eyes. No, he never smiled at her even once. No, he never showed the slightest emotions.

No, he doesn't know what he's feeling towards her.

Notes. The reminiscent of her notes made him feel deeply, in- love. Now he was unsure. He felt lost in his own wish for her to give up on loving him. As if he lost essence on what defines him.

He sat at the bench, where he first met her. And when she first smiled to him. Where everything between the both of them happened. The root of everything.

"Admit. You feel something for her."
So Jin had sat beside him. He sighed deeply at his friend's question. It felt right to answer.  Was he just, ignorant? He kept his hands in his pockets. Finding the right piece to his question.

"I guess i do."