fight for control ↠ harry styles [b1] ✓

CHAPTER 59

Harry Styles

Cooking was a nice idea but it never actually happened. Not that it was a problem. It was far from being a problem. I actually preferred the activities that took place instead of making food and I wasn't on my own.

It seemed silly, really. The way we worked. We fought and said nasty things to each other then found our way back to the other like nothing happened. I knew Kensington was used to leaving things in the past, untouched and never talked about. Sometimes, I wished I was more like her and other times, I wished she was more like me. I wanted to be able to leave things in the past and not bring them up after so long and that was something that she was amazing at. On the other hand, she was terrible at talking things through and coming up with a solution. She much more preferred forgetting them and never having to deal with them.

"Oh, god, are you thinking about how to get rid of me?" she spoke up suddenly. Or maybe I was a bit too out of it. Which was probably true. We were in my bed with a massive gap between us and that made me chuckle. She was all over me just three minutes ago and now she laid so far away from me that my dog could have comfortably slept in bed with us.

"Nah, I have that sorted already," I responded as I slowly turned my head to look at her. She chuckled as she kept her gaze on the ceiling with her hands on her stomach, fingers intertwined.

"Impressive."

"Cheers."

Kensington turned her head towards me before she leaned on her side. I watched as she grasped the blanket to cover herself whilst she pushed herself up a little and turned on her stomach. This time around, she was much closer to me. Her hair fell on my chest and our arms touched. I lost myself in her hazel eyes, the way her nose sat in the middle of her face and her cheekbones stood out. I pulled my left arm away from her and placed my hand on her cheek, the skin warm and soft under my touch.

She let me hold her face and she closed her eyes as she leaned into my hold, my thumb stroked her cheek softly. I was taken by surprise when she turned her head and pressed a kiss on my palm. Her cute little chuckle rang in my ears as she slipped on top of me under the covers and I couldn't help but grin as she pushed her lips on mine. I felt her fingers run through my hair before she grasped it in her hands and I ran my hands down her side, all the way to her perfect little arse.

"You're perfect," I mumbled between kisses. Renleigh scoffed but didn't say anything. I knew she didn't agree with me, she never did when I said anything relatively positive about her. But I was going to make sure she got tired of hearing me say nice things about her. She needed to know just how amazing she was.

In every way.

Although, our relationship was not really normal. We just.... Well, I knew she came to me for the sex. It was clear. She needed an outlet to get rid of her anger and frustration, perhaps pain? And I came in handy. Now, that would have made me feel like she used me if I wouldn't have known about her reasons for being with me and also if I wouldn't have had the same intentions. We basically used one another for our bodies but it still managed to help us rebuild whatever we had before the contract was over.

There were nice days throughout the month that we spent together and I cherished those with everything I had in me. Those were possibly the best days of my life and that made me think if she really was the one for me. No one has ever made me feel the way she does and although she didn't seem to reciprocate my feelings to the point where I was at, I knew she cared enough to not hurt me.

I, for one, wasn't planning on hurting her the way I have in the past. Because I know I did. The time in her office when I kissed her. The time at my cousin's birthday. But especially at her dad's birthday party. When I said those things to her about Jack. That was way out of line and I hated myself for being so fucking insensitive. Especially because it all happened on the same day. It made me feel like pure shit when I thought about it – and it happened a lot – but I knew I deserved it. I should have felt shit. It was wrong of me to throw it back in her face like that, to even think it was OK to say something like that. I didn't know how that could trigger her and the fact that I fucked her and then left and didn't see her for absolute ages, just made me an even shittier human being.