fight for control ↠ harry styles [b1] ✓

CHAPTER 89

a.n. don't forget to comment and vote

• • •

Harry Styles

I watched people go by with their trays of food as I occupied one of the uncomfortable chairs in the cafeteria because it made me think time would pass by quicker. Some of them been here since I have arrived, some of them spent double the time I have and others have already left. The area had a tense atmosphere, emotions stuffed to the side as people tried to think of the best. Everyone was in a different situation—someone might have been here because their loved ones were under operation, some of them were here because their loved one was currently going through recovery or maybe because their loved one just gave birth. There were a bunch of reasons why these people were here, taking a break from the stress, the worry and the pain that this place brought them.

My right leg bounced up and down as I fiddled with the napkin in front of me, my phone next to me, screen upwards in case Liam decided to text me. I annoyed him until we swapped numbers. Nothing happened so far, however. It felt like it had been hours since we got to the hospital and I received no news about anything. The stress that sat and chilled in the pit of my stomach started to intensify every five minutes and it was bugging me that I knew nothing.

Finally, when I was really damn close to standing up and going for a walk around the building, I noticed Liam's head through the people who entered the cafeteria the same time he did. I sighed and leaned forward in my chair, my hands flat out on the table. When he got closer, I pushed the chair out from under me and stepped closer to him.

"How is she? Is she alright?" I asked him right away and he put his hands out as he made me step back a few times.

"Yes, she is just fine," he sighed and sat down on the chair that was facing mine. I did the same and sat back down on my already warmed chair. I don't think I've moved from it since Liam told me to wait here for any news. "She woke up, had no idea what happened then the doctor explained they need to run a few blood tests to see if there is anything else that could have caused her to faint."

"So, they don't know why it happened?" I asked back. "What does that mean? Does she have some kind of rare disease or something?"

"I'm not sure," he told me. "The doctor said that she most likely just burned out from work with all the stress that she has to deal with at work and some personal issues."

"Yeah, that happened before," I mentioned quietly. "It's more serious this time, isn't it?"

Liam nodded. "She really has been on the edge for a while now, overworking herself like she did in London. It feels weird to be discussing my boss' health but I am worried about her. I've noticed how much she takes on and no matter how much I take off, she just finds more stuff to do."

"And me ending it with her, most likely made things ten times worse on her," I added. The guilt that gripped onto every single piece of me was indescribable, so strong and disgusting that I couldn't not blame myself for playing a part in her being here. I knew if I wouldn't have done what I did, she wouldn't have been as stressed—I would have made sure she wasn't.

"Most likely, yeah," he agreed. Well, at least he didn't beat around the bush.

"Does she want to see me at all?" I decided to ask. That was all I cared about. I wanted to see her, I wanted to make sure she was OK and alive and healthy and together. I needed to hold her and see her and kiss her forehead. I didn't deserve any of those things, I didn't deserve her but I needed her.

"I think she wants answers more than anything but I wouldn't overwhelm her with a bunch of shitty explanations."

I sighed but nodded. I understood. I wasn't going to give her a whole speech about what happened. Not here, not right now. Her well-being was more important. Plus, if she allowed me to see her and be near her, I didn't want to push her away instantly by explaining my shitty actions.