Her Voice / han sanghyuk (#14)

Episode 27

Sanghyuk

I screamed in agony as I stared at the blank piece of paper in front of me, my mind is also blank as well, I don't even know what I am supposed to do for this question. I know that you have to subtract the inequalities and move them to the other side for it to be equal but I don't even know which numbers are the inequalities, I seriously have no talent for mathematics. I placed the maths textbook aside and glanced over at the other homework that I am supposed to be doing, I realized that they are the same as the math question earlier, they are equally hard and I don't know exactly how to solve them. Why do I have to be this stupid?

I remembered that I wasn't this stupid when I was back in elementary school when homework was a lot easier, I could do all of this maths equations so easily until they added algebra, that was the moment when I realized that I was a very stupid child who can't do maths at all. I can never understand all of that even though I try it, it doesn't matter if I were to do the same question over and over again, I still won't get it and it is proven by the red marks that I get on my papers every single time.

I groaned in annoyance and I had someone throw a pen towards my direction and I could barely dodge it in time, my reflexes are still as quick. "Stop groaning! You're ruining the perfect atmosphere that we are in, it was good until you started to groan and moan." Yang Dongmi expresses her frustration towards me.

I rolled my eyes. Isn't she falling asleep earlier? "You are very annoying as well, you were falling asleep and you talked all the time that I couldn't even concentrate. If you can't do maths, you can't do maths, just give up on it."

Jooeun looked at me and shook her head, telling me to stop arguing with Yang Dongmi but I couldn't help it, there is no way that we wouldn't quarrel with each other, we are basically like nemesis who literally have to argue with each other to survive. "Let's take a break since all of us couldn't take it anymore." Hakyeon sunbaebim announced as he put down his pen. "How are you guys getting?" He ordered all of us to give over our maths assignment so that he can check up on our progress and I can say that I hadn't improved much at all.

It is a fine Saturday afternoon and we are at a nearby bookstore, apparently, Hakyeon sunbaebim works part-time and thus he was able to get us here to study without any charge and he can still work at the same time when he isn't teaching any of us. That day when he issued the challenge of passing the damned subject at the library, I was hooked on the reward that he had proposed, I just knew that I had to take up the challenge no matter what.

The loser of the challenge would have to grant any wish that the winner wished for, it could be anything ranging from a request to something simple like food. I didn't want to take up the challenge because it is impossible, there is no way that I am going to pass the subject when I haven't passed it since 5th grade. It is a very ridiculous thing to do and I don't think that I actually have a chance at winning the challenge against Yang Dongmi.

She was lying about her not being good in maths, I have been classmates with her for the past term and she has been in top 10 of the cohort for maths, she only pretended that she was bad at it because she wanted Hakyeon sunbaenim to tutor her. But Jooeun was there and she heard everything even though she wasn't able to give any verbal responses to that, she wasn't really eager on taking up the challenge when Hakyeon sunbaenim asked her to but I saw that determination that she wanted to pass and I encouraged her to take part as well so she did.

And I couldn't refuse and now I have to study my hardest to win the challenge so that I could have my wish granted by Jooeun, I have something in my mind that I have been wanting to tell her for quite a while, the question that I am always wondering about. Does she have any feelings for me? There are many ways to ask that question and one of the most obvious ways is to confess to her straight on but clearly, I wasn't that kind of a person to do that, I can't even look at Jooeun in the eye so how can I even tell her that I like her?

And confessions don't work all the time, it only works if the other person feels the same as you and the chances of getting rejected is so high, there is no way that I will be accepted. We have only been friends for less than 3 months, it is way too early for our relationship to progress so quickly, I don't want our relationship to go all sour just because of a failed confession.

But I still wanted to know her answer, if she has someone that she likes or whether she likes me or not, even if I get rejected or not, I at least have to know her feelings towards me so that our relationship would be stronger as friends even if we don't end up together. I still wanted to be friends with her even if we aren't dating, I can't lose her as a friend, she is my only friend.

I felt a tap on my shoulder and she was there looking at me, her sparkling eyes shining brightly and I could feel my heart pounding hard again. 'Do you want to go to the café together? I need some coffee and I need help communicating.' She wrote that down on a textbook. Why not? I'm willing to cross the ocean with no safety suit on just to make sure that you are fine.