Her Voice / han sanghyuk (#14)

Episode 37

Jooeun

I stood by the school gates after my chauffeur has dropped me off, my neck constantly stretching out to find that one person that I have been searching for the past few minutes. I know that it is still too soon for him to return back to school, he suffered too much from this ordeal and he is excused from school for as long as possible to get his thoughts in check, he has just lost his grandmother and he needed a long time to mourn her and move on with his life, no one would talk about him taking too long of a break, he needed that break to let himself accept the reality and get back on with his life.

I looked at all the other students, I wonder if they have any idea about it. I hope not so that they will have nothing bad to say to Sanghyuk when he returns back to school, I know that they can be that evil and merciless and plus Sanghyuk is infamously known throughout the entire school for being reckless with everything that he does, he beats everyone up that pisses him off.

That was all true, he used to do all of that because he was insecure of himself and he needed something to make him seem strong to the others and not allow them to see his weak side which is completely acceptable as well, his high ego prevented him from unleashing his softer side to the others in fear they might ridicule him for being so soft.

But everyone has a soft side to themselves and it is a matter of showing it to the others as their main side or not, Sanghyuk's soft side is really unexpected but he should really show his soft side in public every now and then. Because I had seen the rowdy and rough side of him when I first met him and I hated that side of him, I liked his soft side instead, he really listens well to his grandmother and his older sister, cleans his room once a day because his grandmother would scold him if he wouldn't, and he takes great care of the once stray cat Chloe as if he really bought her back from the pet store.

All of these qualities made him seem more like a human more than anything else and I liked that side of him, it is a total contrast from the persona that he had created himself and I wished that he would drop that persona as soon as he can, it is not him at all. But what I want from him now is not to ignore me as I am some stranger, I really want him to remain the same and talk to me as if nothing happened. It would really break my heart if he stops talking to me and that my wish would be fulfilled, my wish of him ignoring me so that he wouldn't have to suffer so much but I don't want that to happen, I want him to continue to talk to me even though I know perfectly well that I wouldn't be able to reply him but I am happy seeing him paying attention to me and that is enough for me.

The school bell rang and there is still no sight of him at all, I guess that he still needed more time to rest at home and I would spend the rest of today with myself, eating lunch on my own for the past week but I can't blame him. It is not like I can force him to come to school no matter what to spend time with me, if he needs more time, then I wouldn't complain about it at all and wait till he is ready to go back to school.

The discipline master announced in his loud voice, telling everyone that the school gates are closing and everyone who arrives after that would be considered late and it would definitely affect their attendance and it wouldn't look good on their report book. I let out a huge sigh as I made my way into the classroom when I heard a familiar voice shouting into the distance and I turned my head towards the direction, I let out a smile as I watched the guy dashed his way through the gates before it closes and he bows down to the discipline master who looked dumbfounded of his actions but I am happy that he is here and then he saw me.

He made his way towards him and I could see that he had returned back to his usual self but something about him has changed, he isn't that happy anymore but I don't mind, as long as he is happy, I have contented already.

"Hey..." He smiled at me. "How was school been without me around?"

I shook my head as we walked into the school grounds. "You felt empty right? But now I am back already and I am ready to study, and not to squabble with Yang DongMi. Is she in school today?"

I shook my head and I mouthed the words 'sick' and he nodded with a relieved look on his face. "Thank God, I thought that she will be going to bombard me with questions as soon as I am back."

I smiled, glad to see his energetic self returned back to his soul and the way he is talking shit about someone behind their back. And then he got hit in the head by a paper plane, it didn't happen because it flew into the school grounds by accident, someone threw it and it was with the intention that it would hit Sanghyuk in the head.

I was afraid that he might get angry at that but he continued to smile as if nothing ever happened, I was mistaken for a moment if he even knew that a paper plane hit his head. And then a paper bullet was catapulted into his face and it was done by our classmates but he still continues to smile and isn't bothered by it, it is as if a wire inside his brain is wired wrongly and it has made him smile at the things that should've made him angry. Is he pretending that everything is fine?