| COMPLETE | THE SEQUEL 'Hate Me Tomorrow' IS OUT NOW | no translations |
"Tell me about when you do hate me." He insisted.
Our chests were inches apart and his nose was very close to mine. I was looking up at him as he still stood towering over me...
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Last night went really well with Gemma coming home.
I was more than excited to see her, I was the first to hug her when she got here. She wasn't going to be here the whole time Juliet and I were so I had to take advantage of all the time I had.
The whole day was really relaxing and exactly what Juliet and I needed to rest up and recover from our jet-lag.
Up until Jules almost had a panic attack everything was perfect, but I didn't let that ruin anything for us.
I didn't want her to feel like that would ruin our night. It did the exact opposite actually. The whole experience was very eye-opening for me.
Not only did I see that vulnerability from her again, this time she showed that side of her to me willingly.
I'd only been with her a very small number of times during one of her episodes and they were because I'd found her.
But last night she was honest and told me before it happened. She told me she could feel herself starting to slip into that state of mind and she let me help her before it got bad.
When I was in her lap and she hugged me I knew something was off. Not that I minded but Jules was still a little closed off on the affection part of our relationship.
She hasn't quite adjusted to being so open yet.
So the fact that she was holding onto me for dear life was an obvious sign. When I pulled away to look at her I could feel her shaking in my hold. Her face had gone pale and she looked like she was going to be sick.
When she told me she thought she was going to have a panic attack I was surprisingly calm. I was able to keep my head in order to help her.
I was grateful she trusted me enough to let me guide her through that rather than running off to a bathroom and locking herself in there until it was over.
Which is what she used to do.
The image of my Juliet curled up on the floor, in pain, mental and physical, crying and desperatly wanting someone to hold her nearly made me sick to my stomach.
I think that moment between us was a really big step moving forward. Our relationship definitely benefited from it and showed me just how much I loved Juliet.
"Jules? C'mere for a second." I called for her as I sat on the edge of my bed.
It was around 8:30 in the morning and while I didn't want to get up yet, Jules insisted we get up early so we don't waste any of our time on sleep.
