Michelle "Mickey" Gregg is an undercover cop for the Jump Street Program. She has been working with Doug Penhall, Judy Hoffs, and Harry Ioki for two years. Her new partner, Tom Hanson, joins the team and these are their cases.
Revolved around the 1...
I had just turned twenty-two years old, and Captain Fuller gave me the gift of taking a quick break from arresting high school students.
He tossed me the file while I was sitting with my team at the table in the chapel squadroom. I opened it and saw a polaroid picture of a greasy, crusty man's mug shot attached to my papers. I flipped through them with a puzzled expression until I saw my name and my backstory, "Mistletoe Mickey?"
Fuller nodded, "the mall Santa over at the Metro Mall has been receiving complaints from the parents about their mall Santa Claus. I just want you to go and see what's going on."
"Why can't the employees do it?" I asked.
"Because he gets on his best behavior when he's around his bosses. Apparently, he had great references but we have reason to believe that they're fake. You're going to be his elf, and we've already picked up your uniform."
I glanced back to our little costumes department and saw a little green number with golden jingle bells dangling out. I groaned, and Fuller assured me that this should be an easy bust.
I refused to get dressed in front of my coworkers, no matter how much they begged. I grabbed the costume and told them I'd see them later, and I left.
I arrived at the mall and talked to my boss-for-the-week, and changed into demeaning red and white striped tights, a little green dress with jingle bells, black boots, a tight black belt, and a matching hat that laid over my wavy hair. I looked and felt ridiculous.
I met the Santa and even behind his fake beard, I could easily tell he was the crusty man in the picture. He told me his name was Willie. I introduced myself, and he reeked of booze. That seemed like enough to fire him, but I guess it wasn't.
I was instructed to just take photos of him and the children, and sell them to the parents. If I was a parent, I would never let my child near this man.
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Throughout the shift, he kept saying inappropriate things to the children. Why don't you wish in one hand, and shit in the other. See which one fills up first... when a kid asked if he was Santa he replied, no, I'm an accountant. I wear this fucking thing as a fashion statement... when a kid said that he wanted a certain toy, Willie asked, what the fuck is that?... just a bunch of jaw-dropping stuff. It was pretty obvious that the parents were not hearing these obscene comments. I had to force myself to smile, which made my cheeks ache.
It was finally our lunch break and we told the kids in line that we would be right back. Willie almost immediately took off his fake beard in front of all the children and wondered into a little gingerbread house set we had next to our station. The inside had a table with a hot coco machine, a tub of candy canes, and our belongings.
I followed him in there and as soon as the door closed, I asked, "hey? What the hell was that?"
He coughed up a loogey and muttered, "I'm working. And, it's none of your fucking business," before spitting it in the corner.
