The Son of Lord Voldemort

Chapter 135

Cass watched as rolling green hills turned into snow capped mountains. A chill ran down her spine and she pulled her velvet cloak tight against her body. For the first time, it felt strange sitting on the Hogwarts Express. She usually spent the journey from King's Cross to Hogwarts laughing at her friends' silly jokes or talking about how they were going to spend their weekends down by the lake. But as she looked away from the window and at her friends she saw that no one was so much as smiling, and no one looked as if they cared to discuss future plans.

Draco was sitting opposite her, looking out the window. Although, to Cass it seemed as if he wasn't seeing anything. His eyes were glazed over, as though he was lost in thought. Leo was staring down at a book, but he hadn't turned a single page since entering the compartment. Blaise was leaning back, staring at the ceiling, and occasionally running his hand through his hair. Jenna was looking around the compartment, her eyes slightly red. While Daphne, Pansy, and Tracey were trying to sleep. The only one who didn't look completely miserable was Harrison, which was a surprise to Cass, as she knew Theo's death had devastated him.

"We can't keep on like this," Harrison said suddenly. Everyone looked at Harrison. "Theo is dead." Cass flinched.

Harrison continued, "Theo is dead, and us being miserable isn't going to bring him back. We're going to be at Hogwarts soon, and we can't walk in there as nothing more than zombies. We're Slytherins. We represent more than ourselves. People die every day. This is war. Theo won't be the last to die. We need to accept that and keep going."

"Harrison," Daphne said sharply.

"No, Daph," Harrison said, his tone even sharper. "It's the truth. All we can do is protect ourselves and the people we love the best we can. We all know that it's going to get worse. The storm is coming, sooner than it was supposed to. Do you not think it hurts me being here without Theo? It does. But the longer we spend grieving for him, the longer we go without getting ready. If we aren't ready…" He looked around the compartment. "I don't want to lose any of you."

Daphne touched Harrison's arm. "You aren't going to."

"That's what Theo once told me," Harrison said sadly.

Cass felt as though her stomach had grown arms and was trying to punch its way out of her stomach. It had been nearly two weeks since Theo had died, and she still saw images of his dead body every time she closed her eyes.

Blaise placed his hand on her knee and Cass shot him a grateful smile. She didn't know what was going on between her and Blaise. She hadn't meant to sleep with him, it had just happened. Then it happened again, and again. Blaise had been one of her best friends since before she even understood what that meant. She had always found him attractive, but she had never seen him as more than a friend until he had come by to check on her the day after Theo had died. She had suddenly seem him in an entirely new light. Whether or not it was her guilt and sadness that drew her to him she didn't know. And at the moment she didn't care. All she knew was that when she was in his arms she felt like everything would be ok.

"I agree with Harrison," Cass said.

Everyone looked at Cass in surprise. She hadn't said anything all morning. She swallowed. She had been so angry over her mother's miscarriage, then sad and guilty over Theo's death. She was starting to feel as though she was drowning from all of the negative emotions she was experiencing. But she knew that if she didn't want to lose anyone else she needed to fight her way to the surface.

"I can't lose any of you," Cass said quietly. She looked out the window, a beautiful frozen lake in the distance. "I couldn't survive it."

The cart descended into silence, and Blaise slipped his arm around her shoulders.