Love is not a choice

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Wattpad decided to flag my story for mature content

Idk what that means, especially since I went through the wattpad guidelines and besides violence, I don't infringe on any of the rules

All I know, is that if wattpad takes down any of my stories

It will be very detrimental on my health

I wanna die

Panic attacks during school aren't fun

Anyways...I hope you all know that I platonically love all of you guys so much.  I support you guys no matter what sexuality or gender you identify as.  I hope you all are able to reach the point where your comfortable with your sexuality and happy with your pronouns/gender.  If any of you guys need help or support, please feel free to message me
❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

TRIGGER WARNINGS :

Logan POV
Patton.  Just think of Patton.  Don't let them take him from my mind.  It'll be okay.  I'll be out of her soon. 

I stared ahead of me at the door.  The doors that lead to the outside.  Freedom is so close yet I'm so terrified to go to it. 

It's now been 21 hours, 42 minutes, and three seconds since I arrived.  I've only talked to the lady that goes by Mother once.  I've only had one true therapy session so far.  I haven't seen my parents since I arrived.  And none of my friends have come for me. 

Apparently now that I've gone through a session, I am able to roam certain areas of the reformatory.  I'm not allowed outside yet but no ones come to stop me yet. 

My anxiety has been gnawing at me since I arrived.  Even more now so that I can literally see freedom a few feet away.  But this place is terrifying and I'm afraid to move. 

I just need to force myself to walk forwards.  Then I'll be free of this place.  They legally can't stop me because I'm a legal adult.  And then I'll sue this place and alert the police to their activities. 

Clouds blotted out the sky today yet I didn't mind.  I could see other people much younger than me walking around outside. 

I wish I knew how to help them.  But as of right now, I only know how to help myself.  I just need to start walking. 

My foot moved forwards.

A jolt of terror went through me and I went rigid instantly.  Nothing happened and no one came to yell at me.

I took another step forwards.  Freedom was now only a foot or so away. 

Now I just need to reach up and open the door.  But what if an alarm goes off?  I'm being illogical.  Based on how far I've moved so far, the chances of being stopped now are infinitesimal. 

If only I could be brave and confident like Roman, Remy, or Damien.  They would be able to match right out of this place and fight anyone that gets in their way.

But I'm just a weak nerd.  I could solve any equation or question put in front of me.  Yet this situation greatly hinders me.

Two big fears of mine need to be broken if I am to escape.  One, I must break a rule.  While it's a rule that I don't agree with, I've always had trouble breaking rules.  That might just be more emotional brainwashing from my parents. 

Also, this involves emotions.  I have to be courageous in this situation.  I have to be strong mentally yet the longer I'm here, the more I start to shut down. 

To make matters worth, I'm not using logic in this situation at all.  If I waited and watched, I could probably find a much safer and sure way to escape.  But I can't handle being here any longer. 

I forced myself to take two more steps forwards.  I was now at the door.  I raised my hand and grabbed the door handle. 

Panic skyrocketed through my heart in a painful way.  Slowly, I pushed the door open.  No alarm sounded. 

Breathing a soft sigh of relief, I slipped out of the building.  The door shut softly behind me and I moved along the wall.

Now that I was outside, a bit of confidence filled me.  They can't stop me now.   I'm outside and technically free. 

I started walking down the dirt path that led to the road.  People looked up at me in confusion.  I ignored them and kept walking.

Orderlies were alerted of what I was doing and pretty soon, three men started running towards me.  I turned and flared at them. 

"I am an adult,"  I told them sternly.  "You legally can not keep me here against my will."

"You're just going to tell the police,"  The tallest one said.  He looked to be very angry.  "We aren't letting you leave."

"Don't make this harder on yourself,"  I said.  "I'm already charging this place with many illegal activities."

"We won't be letting you do that,"  The short, fat one growled at me.

"You can't stop me,"  I repeated aloud.  Saying it made me feel better. 

I turned and started walking away again.  One of them grabbed my arm but I forced them off me.  I continued to walk. 

The others started cheering me on.  I smiled a bit.  Maybe this will start a riot and these poor people will run away with me. 

Suddenly, two cars appeared.  Speeding down the road towards this place.  They parked down on the street and a familiar face jumped out.

Patton. 

Without even thinking about it, I started running.  Patton ran towards me, stumbling a bit at first. I couldn't focus on anything other than Patton. Not everyone else getting out of the cars and the police cars following.

I ran into Patton and pulled him tightly into my arms.  I held him tightly and squeezed my eyes shut to stop the tears. 

Patton pulled away but that was only to bring me down for a kiss.  I kissed back greedily, digging my hand knit his soft hair. 

The others from the reformatory started cheering.  Clapping and yelling support.  Patton and I pulled apart and hugged tightly. 

I just held him.  Beyond happy that we're together again.  Shocking me from my thoughts of Patton, more people ran into me.

Everyone was here, joining in the huge group hug.  Roman, Virgil, Damien, Remus, Quinn, Evan, Remy and Emile.  I've never been so happy to see their faces. 

"Are you okay?"  Patton asked, tears streaming down his face. 

"What did those fuckers do?"  Remy asked, glaring daggers at the building. 

"I'll be fine,"  I sighed.  I know it's bad to repress emotions like this, I've learned it the hard way.  But I don't feel like talking about it right now.  "They just drugged me at one point, but it was just a sleep inducing shot.  I went through one conversion therapy session."

"I'm so sorry,"  Patton cried, trying his best to comfort me.  Hugging me tightly and planting kisses all over my face. 

"How did all of you find me so quickly?"  I asked.  "And thank you so much for showing up when you did."

"Internet,"  Remy answered. 

"And then we called the police about it,"  Damien added, pointing to where police were handcuffing all the orderlies.  Others helping the more abused kids. 

"So we got the gang together and came guns blazing to rescue you,"  Remus added, swinging an arm around Evan's shoulder. 

I'm surprised they were able to come, especially Evan.  It's the middle of the school day, I'm shocked they all came for me and missed school.  Remus however, I'm not surprised. 

"This place is horrible,"  Emile whispered.  "I'm so sorry you had to deal with this Logan." 

"Horrible it was, but I was here less than twenty four hours,"  I sighed.  "I'll be okay."

"It's over now,"  Patton told me. 

I nodded a bit, trying to convince myself.  I pulled Patton in for another kiss.  I'll be needing lots of cuddles from him tonight.

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